Oakwood Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (Toronto Ontario, Canada)

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M omoow . Goods Natural History Teacher: Rastus, what animal is most noted for its fur? llastus: De skunk: de more fur you gits away from him, de better it is fur you. Goblin Give me a pound of insect pow- der. Do you wanna take it with you '? Well yes, you don't expect me to bring the bugs here do you '? Blue Gator The guards went grimly about their task of affixing the electrodes to the body of the doomed man in the chair. The kindly chaplain bent over him. Any request, my poor mortal '. he inquired? Yes parson , the wretch replied, 4'lt'll comfort me a whole lot if you'll just hold my hands. Northwest Purple Parrot 7-Q Newspaper Solicitor: You adver- tised with us yesterday morning for a nightwatchman? Solicited: Yes I did. NS.: Did you get any results? S.: Yes, my place was robbed last night. State Lion He may have been a ham-but his sugar cured him . llutgers Chantlcleer , . --7 ilkf' Smopsky '31: I have nothing but praise for this church. lrask '3I: So I notice when the plate comes round. Acadia Athenaeum Margaret '3I: I have an appetite like a canary. Lida '3l: Yes you have-you take a pick at a time. Acadia Athenaeum The sofa sagged in the centre The shades were pulled just so The family had retired The parlour light burned low. There came a sound from the sofa As the clock was striking two And the student slammed her text- book With a thankful 'AWell I'm through I L.C.C.l. Review Father treading letter from boy at B.C.S.J : Well, well. Henry says he got a beautiful lamp from box- ing. Mother: Oh l'm so glad! I knew he would be rewarded for his in- terest in athletics. Bishops College School Handkinson '31: I tore my hand- kerchief yesterday. Freshette tsympatheticallyl : That must have been a terrible blow! A. A. A. Page Fiffy-Tl1r1'1:

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THE OAKWOOD ORACLE Walker: The cowboys in Texas don't catch steers on horse-back any more. Yicary: Why don't they 7 Walker: Because steers don't ride horse-back. Collegian Sayary: Is there any difference between a yision and a sight? Carrick: No. Sayary: Then my girls a vision and yours is ai? tSayary is doing nicely nowl. S. A. C. Review Kellam: You know that I saved a girl from drowning last year 'P Hull: No did you '? Kellam: Yeh! I saw the tide was washing her out so I threw her out a cake of soap to wash her back. Conning Tower Hear about the Scotchman who went insane? No! How did it happen '? He bought a score card and nei- ther team scored. Conning Tower Morning Song. Each morn the rosy-fingered dawn Comes up so poets say And robins chirp along the lawn To greet the newborn day: From bough to bough the blue birds flirt: The leaves with dew are pearly: I'll take the poet's word for it I don't get up that early. GOBLIN. Frank-I told her every time I kissed her it made me a better man. Lou-.-Xnd what did she say '? Frank-She said, I needn't t1'y to get to heaven in one night. Water to water lnk to ink The flappers do What the old maids think! Page Fifty-Four Try This! A young man was able to take a different girl each night to the most expensive restaurant in town. Before going in he told them they were getting stouter. ' L. L. A. Helen: Fatso you have been so good to me that I'm going to do you a favour. You can take me to din- ner tonight. Fatso: That's good Helen, does your mother know we're coming? Lampadion Scotch Traffic Code Red Light: Stop the engine. Yellow Light: Get out and crank. Green Light: Go fast and save gas. Reserve Red Cat What's the differenc.e between a girl and a horse? I don't know. I'll bet you've had some great dates. L. M. H. Fair accused: I wasn't going thirty miles an hour-not twenty- not even ten, in fact when the offi- cer came up I was practically stand- ing still and- Magistrate: One moment, I must stop you--or you'll be backing into something. Ten dollars and costs. Lampadian. Isl. S. M. 1To raw recruitl: I've seen your face before. R. R. Cexpectantlyj : Yes, sir ? ll. S. M.: It was on a salmon can, you poor fish. u R. Il.: l've seen yours before too, sir. I-3. S. M.: Yeah! Where? R. R.: On a sack of tobacco- vou big bull!