New London High School - Whaler Yearbook (New London, CT)

Page 31 text:

BULKELEY NEWS 29 “Never mind, papa,” said young Bab-bidge, “when I grow up I’ll be a highway man.” “Did your sweetheart receive you warmly last night ?” “No, but her father did.” “How wag that ?” “He fired me.” “Permit me, then, to die at your feet!” Wadleigh cried desperately. Marion shivered. “I see no objection to that,” she answered, “All papa said was that you mustn’t hang around here.” De Biasi—“What is the difference between the admission to a dime museum and the admission to Sing Sing ?” Fresh—“Don’t know. What?” De Biasi—“One is ten cents and the other is sentence.” LATIN ENGLISH history FRENCH physics Miner—“I gave a foot-ball player one dollar to-day.” Belden—“Did you get it back ?” Miner—“No; I got it half-back.” “What is the secret of success?” asked the Sphinx. “Push,” said the Button. “Never be led,” said the Pencil. “Take pains,” said the Window. “Always keep cool,” said the Ice. “Be up to date,” said the Calendar. “Never lose your head,” said the Barrel. “Make light of everything,” said the Fire. “Do a driving business,’, said the Hammer. “Aspire to greater things,” said the Nutmeg. “Be sharp in your dealings,” said the Knife. “Find a good thing and stick to it,” gaid the Glue. “Do the work you are suited for,” said the Chimney. His Bit. Said the “skeeler” to his vidtim, As on his nose he lit, “You will pardon my intrusion— I am here to do my ‘bit’.” Fakoury '22 (?) was seen reading “The Son of Tarzan”. Was he trying to trace his ancestry ? Miss Carr—“Jimmy, give me a sentence with the word ‘seldom’ in it.” Fresh—“My father had a couple of calves, but he selled ’em.” AN INCIDENT OF THB FaM DANCE. “Who is the belle, tonight?” asked she As they stood on the ballroom floor, He looked around the room to see— She speaks to him no more. Fitch (trying to be complimentary)— “Really, you know you’re just ripping.” Fair one (anxiously)—“Goodness gracious! Where?” Lawrence—“I just got a letter from my brother. He’s somewhere in France.” Cody—“Huh ! It’s just like that guy to get lost over there.” Whiton’s wife was very sick. She wrote to her husband as follows : “Beans dear, I am going to Heaven and you will never see me again.” Saunders—“I’ve got to write a theme on the Muses. What is the name of the Muse of Dance ?” Donovan—“St. Vitus.”

Page 30 text:

28 BULKELEY NEWS Thb Frishman’s Lament. “I -wish I were a Senior And with the Seniors stand, With a pony in my pocket And a Cicero in my hand.” Fowler—“Well, McBride, is there as much billing and cooing as there was before marriage ?” McBride— The billing has increased largely.” Mclnnis—‘‘It’s a burning shame !” Skip—‘‘What’s a burning shame ?” Mclnnis—‘‘That pipe of yours.” Breathes there a man With soul so dead Who never to himself has said When he stubbed his toe against the bed ?!?!”?-)”? ‘‘Mr. Britton proposed to me, mama.” “And you accepted him, I hope ?” “No mother, I could never love a man with red hair.” “But, my dear girl, you should consider that he has very little of it.” T. Gannon—“I think there are microbes in kisses.” She—“Have you tried one of mine?” She—“If you had never met me, would you love me just the same?” Babbidge (convincingly)—“Yes dear, more.” Here lies the body of Sally Round, Lost at sea and never found. A Wet One. Hamilton—“Ever hear the story of the fountain ?” Beebe— “No, spring it.” Why Another ? Father—“You say you love my daughter?’ McBride—“Love her, my dear sir ! Why, I would die for her. For one soft glance from her lovely eyes I would throw myself from yonder cliff, and perish.” Father—“Indeed ! Well, I’m something of a liar myself, and I fancy one is enough in a small family like mine.” Two interned American gobs went into a restaurant in Holland and ordered “Turkey with Greece.” The waiter said, “I am sorry, but I can’t Servia ” The gobs said, “Call the Bosphorous.” The Boss came and said, “I am sorry, boys, but I don’t like to Russia but you cannot Rumania.” So they left Hungary. —Ex. Sunday School Teacher—“God does not blame you for what you do not know.” Pupil—“I wish the High School teachers were more God-like.” Only good-looking people are to read this : •paipouoa os aq i.uppioM i —Ex. There is some comfort in belonging to the orchestra. Members are not expelled to laugh at vaudeville jokes. Our idea of a pessimist is a man who lies on a sick bed and figures out how much his funeral will cost. Dark night One bench Clouds gather Couple drenched. “My son,” said a stern parent, “I dislike your low ways !”

Page 32 text:

30 bulkeley news Teacher—I’ll bet you haven’t looked at your lesson.” Bailey—‘‘No, I’ve overlooked it.” A Taee of Prohibition. ‘‘What ale9 the porter?” ‘‘His young daughter wines all the time, and he i9 going home to liquor.” Since I received your S. O. S., I hold your I. O. U. Remit to me, R. S. V. P. And do it P. D. Q. McD—‘‘Say, who wrote the most—Dickens, Warren, or Bulwer Lytton?” Mcl—“I couldn’t tell you; who did?” McD—‘‘Why, Dickens, of course.” Mcl—“How do you know that ?” McD—‘‘Why, Warren wrote ‘Now and Then’; Bulwer Lytton wrote ‘Night and Morning’; but Dickens wrote ‘All the Year Round’.” You can lead a girl to the ballroom, but you can’t make her fox-trot. One of Oipstibn’s Funny (?) Jokes. Mr. Stevens—‘‘Remove what you have in your mouth.” Gpi—“I cannot.” Mr. S. (impatiently)—‘‘Why not ?” Gip—“It’s a tooth-ache.” Steward (on steamship)—“Your lunch will be up in a minute.” Joe (seasick)—“So will my breakfast.” In Chemistry. Prof.—“Name three things that contain starch.” Young—“Two collars and a cuff.” Little drops of water Frozen on the walk Make the naughty adjetftives Mix in people’s talk. Mr. Lawrence—“What makes well water hard?” Wadleigh—“Being so low down.” Soph.—“I kissed her when she wasn’t looking.” Fresh.—“What did she do?” Soph.—“Kept her eyes closed the rest of the evening.” Old Gent—“Little boy, I am sorry to see you smoking a cigarette.” Woodworth—“I ain’t smoking it. I’m keeping it alight for another feller what’s gone on an errand.” “What is the slipperiest thing in the world ?” “Why, two eels wrestling on a cake of ice.” Sullivan—“If I only had money, I’d travel.” She—“How much do you need ?” rv t Established 1824 RensselaerN v Polytechnic Engineering and Science IllollllilC Courses in Civil Engineering (C. E.), Meehan ical Engineering (M. E.), Electrical Engineering (E. E.), Chemical Engineering (Ch. E.), and Gen eral Science (B. S.). Also Graduate and Special Courses. Unsurpassed new Chemical Physical, Electrical, Mechanical and Materials Testing Labora tories. For catalogue and illustrated pamphlets show ing work of graduates and students and views of buildings and campus, apply to JOICN W. NUGENT. H« atiN rar.