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Page 8 text:
CLASSY, WHAT? Well, where did we leave Melvin? Oh, yes, he went to Millsaps and then he went to classes and then he went crazy Because he was right off that if you worked real hard on Freshman Lit. and wrote your weekly impressions you couldn ' t get up all of your trig too and then Van hook thought you were lazy. So then if you tried to get up English Monday and then on Wednesday get up trig, (which is planned economy, the Russians inform us) The English assignment on Monday would be trivial and on Wednesday it would be enormous. Anyway, he was not alone in these troubles involving education As he realized after a little meditation. So Melvin said, " I will bestir myself and meet my class-mates— " My A-making mates and my fail-mates and my pass-mates— " Eds, and coeds, for misery loves company, " and I might as well know a bunch of people to whom I can be grumpy if I care to grumpany. " So Melvin bestirred himself. He went to the grill and he never took a girl, he just stood there, and smiled aloofly and ate candy, Which led coeds to reflect that at dances he would be handy. In the future they were nice to Melvin, and that made him happy, which all Millsaps students should be, according to our president, M.L.S.* Which is a noble sentiment, we must confess. Melvin learned that there is a vicious circle which is said to be the last word in educational (vicious) circles, Which works this way: you make all B ' s because you go to class regularly and so you are on the Dean ' s list and not required to go to class and this is a great honor. So lest no one realize that you have this great honor you cut a few classes and then you cut a few more and then you take an exam and you don ' t have the B average and then you go to class next semester and get back your B average and so it goes until you feel that life is just a series of ups and downs and wails and gurgles. He was handy in bull sessions too because he read READERS DIGEST and TIME and LIFE And had an excellent memory which could always produce a gorier murder concerning knives whenever someone in the state was murdered with a knife He developed the nonchalance of a dean ' s-list-student-cutting-for-the-thirteenth-time which he employed in walking out of class fifteen minutes early or coming in fifteen minutes tardy. And he was not particular pious, but on the other hand, he wasn ' t nardy. So he was popular among the students whose pictures are represented on the following pages, with borders hemmin ' in. Probably because there is no one of them who did not have at least one of the Attributes attributed to Melvin. except that according to the Millsaps college bulletin, March 1939, 165 of the attributes may be considered as applying to the feminine. *Dr. ML. Smith
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