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Page 29 text:
of Lxttle Eva Wllma 1n her excltement made her appearance amxd over
whelmmg applause and began talkmg the southern dralect there was nothlng left
for Wanda to do but to assume the character Little Eva However thls was
the blggest h1t show ever to be presented m Moscow Your class retams tts repu
tation for appearrng showy for your classmates have a habit of keepmg their names
Now lets journey to crty of Oslo Norway Here at the Umverslty Arch
Thompson IS glvmg his famous rnterpretatlon of Irvmgs Icabod Crane You wlll
remember the day he made hrs debut ln the Englrsh IV class
Travellng across country we arrlve at Stockholm Sweden Thls IS the resrdence
of the Swedlsh Match Makers the Dahlqulst Brothers Harold IS a preacher
and Frank a jusxce of the peace They first learned how to t1e knots m Boy Scouts
Mary Spurgln llves there also for at least a part of the year Marys entrance
mto thxs unlque career was lndeed strange One evening Marys father who
was mterested ln athletics and who recogmzed a good athlete when he saw one accl
dentally snapped on the front porch llght whlle Mary and a gentleman frxend
were occupying the front steps Mary whether frlghtened, or just well meaning
leaped so hlgh as to establlsh a new record for the hlgh jump rn which event
she has represented the U S rn the Olymplcs for several years
The Esklmo Vlllage ahead on the Island of Greenland has become of extreme
mterest to the whole universe for here one of the senlors of 1934 whom you would
least suspect of desxrmg such a cold receptxon IS located The sclentlst, Gayle
Fxeldmg has msp1red the people by teaching them how to bulld screntxflcally con
structed lgloos how to brush their teeth, and how to manufacture 1ce The natwes
have become so enthralled m these occupatlons and are gammg such vast knowledge
that these cultural features have gradually spread to Iceland
Now let s turn to our own United States and swoop down upon Bear Mountain
1n the State of New York On your right notlce the large farm This is the
home of Mary Donaldson owner and manager of the Otis Peters Dalry Farm
Thls farm produces a most expensxve and hrgh class brand of cheese but I can t
descrlbe the taste to you but I know rt has no relative connectxon with lrmburger
Steering down the Hudson we come to the cxty of New York and strange as
If seems one of your classmates has come to thxs great metropolls Here Edna
Burger rs operatmg a pet hospital where especlal attention IS glven to raccoons
Now out past the Statue of Llberty through the Sound to Atlantic Clty
where MHJOIIC Grlest has establxshed a tea room on one of the mam thorough
fares It rs partromzed by the cream of socxety who proclarm Marjorxe as the
Drtftmg across Vlrgmra we are now commg upon Eula Le Sage s Scottle Farm
Whlle 1n school Eulas weakness was for the ohnnys and Wllll3mS between the
ages of 16 and 20 but now IC s the W1lll6S and ohns from 2 to 4
In Phrladelphxa IS Dewey Cases publxshmg firm To allevlate the necessity
of the grotesque spelllng words he rs putting out a modern srmpllfied and revrsed
spellmg book rn whxch all the unnecessary letters rn the words have been cut out,
bemg spelled by sound only
Page Twenty five
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Page 28 text:
that was a good ple, but I do wlsh I hadnt taken that last PICCC
Thxs rs the hrst txme Ive ever known ple to make me feel so heavx Guess
Id better rest after all that thls IS a n1ce soft chart and just before the fireplace,
too Ho hum' That HFC remmds me of the ones we used to bulld 111 Rush s
pasture to roast weemes and Mlss F1I'Cl'l3U would chaperon us but she s
deceased these many years Ho Hum sz sz sz sz sz sz sz sz sz
Whats that Why Miss Frxchau, what are you domg here? It IS my duty
tomght to be your gulde ID frrendshlp to grant you tht prnvxltge of I'LV1CWll1g
the ltfe lllSIOI'y of the seniors who graduated from the Mllford Townslup Hxgh
School 1n 1934
Let us first turn to the clty of gay Paree Here we find Gordon Thompson
who, after studymg the art tn COIELIFCS m the c1t1es of London, Marge Fleld Kellys
vxlle, and Crescent Clty, established Ultra Ultra Modern De CTOIHLIFCS pour
Les Hommes Two of your classmates serve rn the capaclty of spectahsts these
are none other than Gwen Coon and Dale Beaver Whlle 111 hugh school, you r
call, they lntroduced the vertxcal cut and the bang respect1vely For recreatlon
these boys play professronal cat ball, whlch necessltates that they recelve speclal
perm1ts from Presxdent Roosevelt, Secretary of War, Governor of Texas, Athletlc
Board Dlrector, and the Presxdent of France, before each game Upon one occaston
Dale was declared lllellglble to play basketball because he forgot to consult the
House where your former classmate Eleanor Wood, appearlng under the name of
Mrmx Landon, IS stagmg a dance YBVICW, the feature of whlch IS the assembly
hall waddle Thus mnovatlon lmprovlsed by Eleanor durmg her senlor year
at Milford Township High School, has I'6VOlLIIl0l11ZCd Mallilllg and has b en ac
cepted by all famous schools It IS even belng taught the most competent teacher
bemg Mr Kenneth Beech Cohee, formerly of Mllford Townshrp Hlgh School
In Berlin, we behold Professor Wilmer Exben, who 0M1llg tt tht dlscomfort
he was forced to endure whxle 1n school, has lnvented an apparatus for the further
mg of student s comforts He has deslgned an adlustable assembly seat whrch com
bmes the beauty and ease of the old Roman couch and the chalse lounge The
mam features of thxs oversoft convemence are the speclal devlces for throwlng
paper wads and erasers, a pocket for an extra supply of thumb tacks and a radxo
recelvmg set to catch whxspers Look closely There IS the factory, and rt has
the appearance of bemg quxte an lndustrlous place, doesn t 1t9 S rt rs for he
schools the world over have been equxpped with these seats Whoever thought
wtld B111 could ever settle down?
Now we will steer eastward where we shall meet Wllma and Wanda Baltr
who are now starrmg Topsy and Eva rn Moscow Thex art renouned for thexr
portrayals of these parts, but nelther hked to play Topsy s Part because she had
to be blacked with greasy palnt so they take turns platmg the roles Durmg
thelr opening nxght ln Moscow, Wanda played the part of Topsy and Wxlma that
Idgl I usurp fum
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Now cast your eyes to the left. Across the river you see the Paris Opera
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Page 30 text:
To the left IS the firm through which Velma McKee Publlshes the Corn and
Hog ournal of Amerxca Accordlng to her theory hogs are not ralsed they
make themselves Sometimes I belleve she s right
Far ahead you see the c1ty of Cmcmnatl Lucille Stewarts Save Yourself
Hospital IS located here M155 Lucllle has presented to sclentlsts the idea that
only actxon can cure a person of any malady The hospital IS well equlpped with
all kmds of speed and exerclsmg contraptxons Thls hospltal xs qulte a success
and will undoubtedly revolutlomze all of meclncal sclence
In the distance IS the clty of Chicago The Amerncan Tlddly Wxnks Team
composed of three members of your class ts now m action wnth Howard Adwell as
manager Frank Bachman and Glenn Gossett have held the publxc ln the palm of
thexr hands but Freda Hubner the only woman Tlddly Wxnks player has captured
the publlc eye Lets see the outcome of thts contest the stadnum IS crowded
It IS now a tue and Freda IS about to sprung her last chip-there If goes right mto
the cup She has If the world s champlonshlp
There s the World s Fair grounds as one of your classmates IS there we ll have
to move to the south and east George Benner IS now a member of Ripley s Oddn
torxum representmg the only man who while playlng the trombone can do the snake s
Before our eyes IS the Chlcago Theatre-Clyde Bachman s name appears ln the
bright lxghts as a tap dancer and he draws crowds from George Raft s performances
Moving westward we see Roy Haxton ln Des Moines Iowa ln the business of
manufacturing love seats He deslgns them has them made up and trles them
out for a period of three weeks three nxghts each week before placmg hls stamp
of approval upon them
Ghdmg onward we come to the home of ohn Herrlott These vast fields have
brought ohn much wealth See the track all the way around the farm He runs
every mght not rn order to keep fit but because the place is haunted
To your left you see the cnty of Cmaha Vlrgmla Kelley works there She
15 secretary treasurer of the Pa ama Crossword Puzzle Co
Our ourney tends toward a close and then we must sadly wend our way home
ward but let us not forget Floyd Pltzer and Dorothy Peck Floyd 15 llvmg on
a ranch from which he broadcasts daxly as Cowboy ack the Crooner At pre
sent he IS trymg to convmce Dorothy that the house needs a lady but she seems
to thmk that the younger generatlon needs her worse as she edxts a column for
the lovelorn ln the Chlcago Trxbune
Oh oh OH' Ohhhl' What have I done to merit these cruel suffering?
You ve eaten too freely and indulged too much
Who 15 xt that accuses me?
It 15 I even I the Indlgestlon
Oh Oh' for Mercys sake leave me' And I promxse faithfully never to eat
too freely but to exercise daily and l1ve temperately
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