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Page 22 text:
“
CLASS PROPHECY On May 1st, 1966, having been appointed as chairman of the Reunion Banquet for the class of '56', I am sitting here at my desk looking over the list of my classmates. The calender says it's time to send out the invitations. The first one on the list JO ANN SECORD is now head designer for the Acme Uniform Co. which is making all the Air Force suits . Her past experiences qualifies her well for this job. The next in line is LEONARD GRIFFITH who is now chief sorter on the garbage scow U. S. S. Tin Can. He is trying vainly to get the promotion to head of the incinerating department. The next invitation goes to JANICE ACKERMAN, who is now chief dietition for a silkworm farm in Japan. She has made the amazing discovery that silkworms thrive on mulberry leaves. The next goes to KENNY SWANSON who may be paroled from a mental institution in time for the banquet. He fliped his lid when girls started saying yes to his requests for dates. ALAN SHAW is next on the list. He still lives in Medical Lake and commutes nightly to Fairchild trying to get up courage enough to ask his girl to marry him. I must not forget to send one to WARREN COGSWELL. His must be cabled to Stalingrad, Russia, where he is with an agricultural delegation studying the possibilities of grafting Russian buttercups to the seed of American daisies to produce a better feed for hogs to be grown in the Dutch East Indies. MIKE NILLES' invitation goes to Chicago where he is head talent scout for the Chicago Cubs. Mike's recent discovery of an armless pitcher has gained him nationwide fame in the scouting world. He has also introduced into baseball the idea of bat-girls in the place of bat-boys. This adds much color to our national game. Now I go from one side of the country to the other and send one to EDDIE ROSENAU who has a goober (peanut) plantation on the top of Mount Ranier. The greatest portion of Eddie's product is exported to the natives of Africa who use them for earrings, necklaces and nose-pieces. I'm not sure where to send JUDE O'GRADY'S invitation. His mastering the art of yogism aided him when embarrassing circumstances forced him to dematerialize in a Turkish Sultan's haram. ED PAGE'S invitation goes to Fairchild where he is still living with his parents. He is playing guard for the Medical Lake Cleaner's basketball team. He is the shortest man of the team. (It seems they're growing them taller nowadays). MARY HILLBRICK'S invitation goes to Boston where she is playing her jazzy accordian for the Boston Philharmonic Orchestra on Saturday nights. ALMA BAHR is in Iceland where she is head sales manager for the Duece Refrigeration Company. Her gift of gab suits her well for this job. RONDLE TURNBOUGH'S invitation goes to the city jail where he is spending a sixty day sentence on miscellaneous charges, the biggest being operating a floating crap game in one of the downtown sewers. One of the minor charges is his failure to break the stamp on a package of cigarettes. ELAINE IRWIN'S invitation goes to Yuma, Arizona where we find her running a dude ranch. She has succeeded in crossing a Shetland with a Clydesdale to make a new breed of horse. MARLENE NANCE'S invitation goes to Siberia, Russia where she, her husband, and her five children are on a good-will tour. The government figures that her smile will create good will between the two nations. As I quickly seal the envelopes to prevent my being late for my job as head athletic director of the Medical LakeY.W.C.A. I stop and wonder how my classmates will look this decade later. 12 LARRY BIGGS
”
Page 21 text:
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CLASS WILL We, the Senior Class of 1956, being in our right mind, do bequeath and bequit, leave, give and get rid of the following articles, traits and possessions. WARREN COGSWELL, wills his partiality to red to Dean Kinzel. LARRY BIGGS- wills his ability to get along with other boys'girls to Doug Parmeter. ALAN SHAW wills his cryptic tongue and sense of humor to Diane Van Drome in hopes she will treasure it always. JO ANN SECORD wills her many boy friends to Irene F rank. LEONARD GRIFFITH wills the heat risers on his ford to anyone who has a car? like his. MIKE NILLES wills his atheletic ability to J.P. Willard. ELAINE IRWIN wills her musical talent of sorts to Mike Hackley and her unleashed swing to Diane Charon. MARLENE NANCE wills her provocative smile to all mankind. KENNY SWANSON (Daddio) wills his ability to argue to Barbara Cramer. ED PAGE wills his height to Jay Bailey in hopes that he can use it. JUDE O'GRADY wills his snickers in English to Bob Riddell. ALMA BAHR wills her cooking ability to Patty Thackston and her pleasing personality to anyone who needs it. RONDLE TURNBOUGH wills his love for the opposite sex to G.G.(Ed Sonneborn) MARY HILLBRICK wills her jazzy accordian to Sandra Niccolls. ED ROSENAU wills his ability to grow a beard to Jack Denny. JANICE ACKERMAN wills her dancing ability to Erma Turnbough. TO THE FRESHMEN we will these gems of our knowledge. Don't climb up the fountain to drink; the janitor has orders to wipe all specks off the porcelain. Don't walk under a senior's legs in the hall; he might be knock-kneed . TO THE SOPHOMORES we leave a profound pity for their ignorance and for their inability to overcome their condition as long as they remain in that benighted class. TO THE JUNIORS we leave the divine right of kings, which is the sacred and inalienable right to flirt with the secretary, doubt the wisdom of the teachers and disturb the peace of the study halls. TO THE FACULTY we will the fond memories of the intelligent? ? ? ? group of students that they have fostered upon the unsuspecting world. ii
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