Louisiana State University - Gumbo Yearbook (Baton Rouge, LA)

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All phdios by Ba7uki Muhammad 16 Jam Jam 1988

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I I Ever parked illegally at LSU? Sure you have — haven ' t we all ? Just the thought of parking in the West zone (behind the stadium) and having to walk to the Union to buy textbooks, is enough to make even the most honest stu- dent take down their parking tags and squeeze inconspicuously into a visitors space, or worse yet, faculty parking. So why is it that everyone gets out of towing ex- cept you? 1, admittedly, am one of those people who has never had a ticket, at least not one that actually belonged to me. Once every year the traffic department finds it necessary to assign mc a ticket for someone else ' s car, but in all truth I do not own a yellow Subaru and my name is not George Mankers. So how is it that I ' ve been getting away with parking illegally at LSU? Talking to the traffic depart- ment was really enlightening — the fact seems to be that they ' ll tow anyone if given half a chance. Anyone with three out- standing tickets, parked in a DELINQUENT AUTOS await arraignment in car pokey faculty lot, loading zone, or (obviously) a tow away zone — you ' re outta there! Others get tickets until they qualify for one of the above elite classes. So, af- ter you get towed where does your car go? A fenced off area of Kirby- Smith ' s parking lot is the slam- mer for cars of students who don ' t obey parking rules. The guard says it costs a dollar a day to keep these inmates and that after two days, if the owner hasn ' t sprung them, they are transferred to the maximum security facility on Airline High- way. This is the elite of prisons, with high fences and big locks, and a fee of five dollars per day. Often these jailed cars are able to reform their owners and repeat offenders are not likely. So what ' s the total cost to spring your car from one of these prisons? Depending upon if the A few daring students risk parking in marked spaces. The unlucky return to find tickets waiting. Bazuki Muhammad car is registered, it ' s the cost of the ticket plus the room and board fee. If, in the disasterous event that person ' s vehicle is unreg- istered (having not been vaccin- ated for rabies) the fee is an addi- tional twenty dollars to get it reg- istered. There have been few reported cases of tow truck workers being attacked by unregistered cars, by a few unregistered owners maybe, but the cars usually go along quietly. (With maybe a few occasional sputters about the in- justice of it all.) So what does an LSU student do to get a decent parking space? 1 . Get to campus before 7 a.m. or after 5 p.m. 2. Talk a professor into the benefits of exchanging parking tags. 3. Keep at it and pray your luck holds out. Janet M. Barklage

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Cro vds Relish Cajun Satire Once again, in 1988, the annual festival of marshland mayhem (i.e.. Jam Jam) proved to be one of the most irreverent, unreserved and ethnically appealling of all the student acti- vities held during the year. Spon- sored, organized, and basically perpetrated by an LSU Union committee. Jam Jam (or, more properly, the Jambalaya Jam- boree ) is intended each year as an active observation of the uni- que Acadian heritage of southern Louisiana and is something that anyone who has ever quaffed a lukewarm Dixie or has felt a raw oyster glide effortlessly over their tonsils can definitely appreciate. Participated in mainly by pairs of LSU ' s many esteemed greek organizations. Jam Jam usually ends up being an exhibition of skits, cuisine, and basic spring- time bacchanalia — all with that certain cajun flair. An ami- able example of this sort of creole-flavored satire was the skit Seymour and Hebert at the Movies as presented by Pi Kap- pa Alpha and Kappa Alpha Theta which garnered them second place in the entertainment categ- ory of the Jam Jam copmpeti- tions. Adding to the general acoustic mayhem attributed to an event like Jam Jam, several of the panhellenic vaudevillians also utilized bands in their various vignettes, as in the case of Sigma Nu and Delta Gamma, who hour- ly belted out rousing renditions of Bom on the Bayou with the help of the Sigma Nu-manned Swampstock Band. In a more risque vien, Sigma Pi and Chi Omega featured the home-grown game show The Cajun Wheel of Fortune, a presentation which also featured the Reverend Jim- my Swaggart wailing that touching hymn You Beat Me All Night Long. The overall winners of the co- veted Jam Jam sweepstakes title (which incidentally called for a scavenger hunt calling for the live capture of the notorious Bus Driver from Hell ) was the industrious duo of Delta Zeta and Acacia whose lighted theatre for their gala Kajun Vacation skit was a small engineering marvel. No matter the complexity, however, every Jam Jam booth had to be cleaned from sight by that Saturday evening. And with an event that most participants consider an 8-hour, 10-keg affair, this in itself was no mean task. Still, to use an ancient yet still-decaying cliche ' , a good time was had by all . Or maybe a moldy CAJUN cliche ' of equal age would say it even better — Laissez Les Bons Temps Rouler! Steve Zaffuto A trio of down-home Sigma Nu boys whoop it up in Sigma Nu and Delta Gam- ma ' s Swampstock festival. Jam Jam 1988 17