Lehigh University - Epitome Yearbook (Bethlehem, PA)

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studies to which so much of his time is given, that we daily fear lest by a too vigorous application he should be unable to bear the strain, and we should lose him from our midst. Mr. Hazelton. — While I know nothing of the past history of Sim, I have made a slight acquaintance of some of the minor events in his life. His entrance into the class of ' 86 was not more noticeable than that of any other member; he moved in our midst as any other mortal would. But it was not always to be thus. As the days grew on apace, there came a gentle breeze from the City of Peanuts, wafting tidings that once more a chance would be given to the gentle student of Lehigh to mash the beautiful maids of that quaint Dutch town. Sim determined to go, and he went. On the marble doorstep of the mansion of one of the pretty Dutch maids sits Sim. And will you always love me? Soft and sweet as the gentle sighing of an eastern zephyr comes the answer, Yes, dear; but how about dat ice-gream? ' Tis chapel, Sim ' s seat is vacant; and, as the instructor marks him absent, he sighs, The Fair! Winter has passed. Spring has grown to Summer ; the June birds sing merrily jn the trees, and Sim departs for home, a bold Sophomore. And shall this horde of jFrt s imen carry canes ? Sim ' s awful voice thunders into the ears of ' 86. Sayre rises from his seat, and, with deep reverence, Thou hast said. Then Sim doth whoop her up; and hence- forth his name is brought forth from its obscurity. Sim has just said his say ; the members of the board of editors of The Epitome have longed to hear the end, and they have heard it. As they wend their way through the tangled paths leading from their sanctum, I lose sight of Sim ' s noble figure ; his after-life to me is blank. Mr. Surls. — W e are unprepared to give any remarkable facts re- lating to the early history of Mr. Surls. W e accordingly pass over his childhood days, and relate only those incidents connected with his college life. He appeared at Lehigh and registered from Beaver Falls. He entered with zeal upon the study of the habits of the lower animals. He seems, however, to have neglected and spurned the quadrupeds commonly loved by college students, and delighted himself with the serpent only. This proves conclusively that Mr. Surls is not an Irishman ; and while giving one of his free entertainments, and showing the redeeming qualities of his pets, he may be termed the Beauty and the Beast. For complete history and cognomen of each living species, call at the Mansion, where all questions will be satisfactorily answered. Mr. Surls takes a great interest in all class undertakings. He shows his spirit by entering the sports; not to win, but to benefit his Class. He has appeared in the Hare and Hounds, and has distinguished himself in several runs. He is generally employed upon some

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its skeleton, and having thereby incurred the extreme displeasure of its former owners. His ardor, somewhat dampened by this unfortunate at- tempt, has never since been displayed to any great degree ; but, from the large number of college catalogues that adorn his walls, and likewise his daily receipt of the same, we judge that he still nourishes the hope of some day, when he can do so without molestation, prosecuting his researches to his heart ' s content. We are also told that, at home, he is quite an eques- trian, but of this we are unable to judge, all his riding here being done in strict privacy. From our own personal acquaintance with him, we can say that he is a great patron of public fetes and festivals, both within and out of doors, and that he never allows any to escape him — so long as he has a free pass. He is also quite an advocate of monopolies, and he has practi- cally shown this by monopolizing all the business of purchasing Dutch ponies, etc., for the class. Coming from a city of electric light, this place has always seemed rather dark to him, and he has occasionally found it convenient to have a candle light placed in his window to guide him home at night ; but this, it seems, has proved insufficient, and he has now pre- vailed upon the South Bethlehem authorities to place a large lamp directly in front of his residence. With all his faults, he has succeeded in implant- ing himself quite firmly in the hearts of his classmates, for they have honored him, not only by making him one of the editors of Ye Epitome, but by electing him president of his class. Mr. Howe was born, at a very early period of his existence, in Bris- tol, R. I. He is a direct descendant of Mark Antony, the celebrated poli- tican and stump speaker, and whose name, along with those of a few other generals, he bears. The first event of note in Mr. Howe ' s career occurred on the day of his baptism, when he was christened Mark Antony De Wolfe Howe, Jr. Many another weaker nature would have drooped under this burden ; but, though the effort to support the misanthropic character of three such war- like cognomens has embittered a naturally sunny nature, it has not destroyed that reputation for morality which stands as pure and high as his collars. The dissipations he encountered while in that gay and wicked Paris of America, Philadelphia, were counteracted by the culture and refinement of Reading, Pa., and an enforced sojourn with the present Junior Class for three months failed to contaminate him. At the University he shines as an instructor of music as well as a student. His introduction of Lala Ge La and O ' Brien with Knickerbockers has been a boon to the College Glee Club. He is noted more especially for the introduction of the Howe walking-stick, the style of which would have been more widely followed had his friends discovered the wood pile from which it was selected. Why he was elected on the Epitome Committee we are unable to ascertain, unless the class wished to turn his attention to lighter subjects than the numerous

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committee, and here also he is the right man in the right place. They say he will take the Wilbur. Time alone can tell. Richard Singmastkr Breixig, the interesting subject of this sketch was ushered into his present state of existence a number of years ago in the ancient and historic city of Breinigsville, Pa. The events of his early years have been carefully hidden, under the cloak of obscurity, from the gaze and admiration of the world. Yet, since his sojourn in the Lehigh Valley, he has grown into prominence with surprising rapidity. Though a very modest young man — his modesty amounting almost to bashfulness — he counts by the score his conquests over the more susceptible of the weaker sex. He is particularly fond of the study of astronomy, and may be seen, every Friday night, going out toward the mountain to obtain a view of Venus. As these visits often last the greater part of the night, it is safe to presume that Venus is always at home, awaiting the coming of her Adonis. He is noted for his sparkling wit, and his ample supply of original jokes, absorbed from old almanacs and the Texas Siftings. A short time ago, during an outbreak between two factions of the college alliance, Mr. B. was doing guard duty one night, when he was attacked by a brigand with a dagger. The villain was about to carry out his murderous design in spite of Mr. B. ' s eloquent and pathetic appeals for mercy, when his attention was diverted for an instant, and Mr. B., taking advantage of this opportu- nity, quickly withdrew himself and took refuge behind a friendly sapling, that stood some distance away. Subsequent events proved that his assailant was a perfectly harmless member of his own regiment, who, not being of sound mind, had wandered away from the camp, and imagined he was hunting Indians. His weapon was a screw-driver, the only weapon he was allowed to carry. Mr. V. H. Dean was born at Sterling, 111. He resided in the West until 1878, at which time he came to the Lehigh ' alley. In the class of ' 86, we have billiard fiends, drawing room fiends, and numerous other species of the fiend tribe, but Mr. D. can hardly be classed under any of these heads. His mind is an exceedingly well balanced one, and receives all branches of study with equal favor. He is a very sober fellow, never laughs, and his smile, — well, it is warranted sure death at twenty-five paces. Nobody ever got the better of Mr. D. until Sept. 21, 1883. At midnight, on that date, he was perambulat- ing in the Holy Land, and, when nearing the Jordan, he saw with terror a huge, horrible looking pirate rushing towards him with drawn dag- ger, of course Mr. D. immediately decided that Discretion is the better part of valor and acted accordingly. But the demon in human form pur- sued him, gaining at every step, in spite of the strenuous efforts put forth by Mr. D. Providence, however, interposed on his behalf; for, as the