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Page 20 text:
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Osky Wow Smiles Dad—“I saw your teacher today and she said you were at the foot of the class.” Small Boy—“Aw what’s the difference? They teach the same thing at both ends.” Miss Sargent—'‘Don’t you know anything about literature?” owignt N.— Sure, I've written to all the toothpaste companies for it.” Midge J.— Who was the most unlucky man you ever heard of?” Bobby W.— A man who fell from the top of a three story building into a wneelbarrow on the ground and wasn’t lost, then rolled off of the wheelbarrow and broke his wrist and collar bone.” Mr. Henson— Did you ever see the Catskill Mountains?” Dwight Nichols— No Sir!, but I’ve seen them kill mice!” Mr. Glandon meets a boy coming down stairs with four sweaters on. Mr. Glandon— What are you doing with all those sweaters on?” Beginner in manual training: W’ell I was going to varnish a piece of furniture and Mr. Jones said I’d have to pui on at least three coats and it wouldn’t hurt to have four.” Another exam paper Classic: Magna Charta”, the pupil wrote, was a soldier in the Revolutionary war who was seriously wounded. His wife, hearing of the incident, immediately went to him, picked up his gun, and sa.d, Shoot if you must this old grey head, but I will fight it out on ihis line if it takes all summer.” Charles Davis— I see I’m only a pebble in your life.” Mary Wood— I wish you were just a little boulder.” Miss Price— What was the stone age?” Carl Baehr— That was the period when a man axed a woman to marry him.” Jene W.— Are autos ruining the younger generation?” Helen M.— No, younger generation is ruining the autos.” Chas. H.—“Rapid love story on the screen tonight.” Margaret J.— Yes, better one is going on right around us.” M iss Woodruff—(after a Lecture) Are there any questions?” Cecil Harper— Yes mam, How do you calculate the horse power of a Donkey engine?” Mr. Henson—(To Cecil Harper, who was cutting up in class) Cecil, sit down in front.” Cecil—“I can’t, I’m not made that way.” No domestic science course is necessary to enable a girl to make a traffic Jam. Duane Whitaker— Was George Washington as honest as they say he was ?” Kbby Barlow— I tell you George Washington was the honestest man that ever lived.” Duane W.— Then how come they close the banks on his birthday?” (’has. H.— How would you like to have a pet monkey?” Margaret J.— Oh Charley! This is so sudden!” There i a hole in your umbrella. Yes. I know it, I put it there so 1 could see when it stopped raining. THEN AND NOW One hundred years ago today When only wilderness was here, The man, with powder in his gun. Went out and shot the deer. Now times have somewhat changed And on another plan With powder on her nose, the Dear goes out to get the man And usually does.
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