Indiana University - Arbutus Yearbook (Bloomington, IN)

Page 24 text:

iMMS . Ol i€ . ' ' i GOAT O M 1, R M c K THERE arc- two kinds of men, the is licked before he starts and tiie starts after he is licked. Of the two, the former are in the v; ow who One afternoon last fall a chap owning two college ow ho degrees came into my office with his cufifs scram- bled on the edges and his hair straggling. From lajoritv. the moment that he shadowed mv door I knew that ii!H: J

Page 23 text:

li K A M -- THE SEVEN C ' S Froiii Kip iriir ' s L ' Envoi. When life ' s last lesson is mastered and our knowledge is all cut and dried, When the oldest professor has fainted and the youngest instructor has died; We shall sleep! And, faith, we shall need it — lie down for a minute or two Till we get a professor that ' s easy, wiio shall give us nothing to do. The bookworms shall be conditioned, while those who purchase a book Shall be looked down upon as moss-backs. U ' e shall lounge in the cool Book Nook! We ' ll be given gold keys free-gratis; we shall dangle them (in a c hain. While we traverse the Board-Walk together, or wander down Lovers ' Lane. We shall have real fellows to walk with: — Hebel, and Jerry, and Paul ; ' e shall chatter with them a whole evening and never be bored at all, For we ' ll go to the Crescent together, and we ' ll come home by way of Cook ' s Inn, And we ' ll notice the postcards from Hershcy ' s where others before us have been Li the well-house or down Indiana. And the dean she shall never get next; And our favorite teacher shall pass us, if we tell him we haven ' t a text. Our parents shall think we are working for the joy of the work. From afar They shall send us our checks, never seeing the conditions of tilings as they are! INDliA-L

Page 25 text:

ii he was a licked mortal — but he didn ' t know it, and that ' s where the possibility of a story comes in. He explained to me that he was one of the mil- lion tiiat go out into tiic world every June with a bucket of red paint, and intend to tint the zodiac a warm rose color. His specialty, as his sheep-skin assured pros- pective clients who didn ' t arrive, was juggling the revised statutes and keeping beef trusts out of jail. But he had struck out. Nobody needed him, so his bank book told him. He wasn ' t cut out for the law. Yea, verily. The biggest coin ever minted is a man ' s last dollar, my visitor informctl me, and from tiie looks of him, 1 guess he had some first-iiand in- formation. Where do I come in? I asked naively. You are the man who is to get me a job, you see, came his explanation. What can you do? I entured. Anything, from launciiing a battleship to greasing the tracks on a siiueaky turn. I liked his sand and called up a friend of mine. He was the office manager of a concern that could spend a million, but — watched the nickels. We don ' t need anybody, he answered. I told my visitor the bad news. All right, he replied, I ' ll take the next car. No, tiianks, no money. 1 have enough to get up there. That ' s all I ' ll need. I ' m going to land. And he did. To-day lie came do n to uork, I suppose, in Jiis o n motor-car — at least lie could have if he Furtiiermore, lie is making good witii a big G. Tlie man wlio did not have the nerve to turn iiim down says so — and tlie boss gets his informa- tion from the cash drawer. Three cheers for the fellow who knew how to guard his goat — for verily this is the secret of get- ting y(.)ur meal ticket. In three vears after vou are out of college you will agree with me. Just make a mental note of that. L, DJIAMAJ