Hughes High School - Hughes Yearbook (Cincinnati, OH)

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informed that your-got three throws for five, I made an at- tempt, and succeeded in getting one, which I sold to some easy mark a little later for 14 cents. Right across the way was a. lemonade stand, In charge of Margaret Barkley and Bess Broerman, and seeing me pass, insisted on my taking some, which I willingly did, and while I was standing talking, along came Raphael Isaacs,walking' with an Annual under his arm, and very busily engaged in an argument with himself. He was talking so loud that I could not help hearing what he was saying. It seems that the young men of Hughesville were thinking very seriously of giving the young ladies a dance, to repay them for one that had been tenderd them many Ueapl years ago. but somehow they could not agree as to the amount each should pay; some were willing to give ten Cents, but the majority thought that too large a sum, and would not volunteer a Lickle, so Isaacs was appointed to ask one of the ladies how much she had given toward the other dance. but she had told him that it was none of his business. At this he had Flown into a passion, and vowed that they should not give them a dance at alll A few minutes later, Harold NEavc came along and in- vited me to accompany him to the games, and thinking this a good chance to have my admission paid, I grabbed his arm, and we started off. We did not stop to talk to anyone on the way, so arrived at the gate in a short time. Max Fried- man, the door-keeper took our tickets. and called an usher. who happened to be M. Miller. He ran ahead so quickly that we had some trouble in following. After we were seated. we heard the cries of Edna Ringold, Here you are, get your programmes right here, Every event marked, high lope walkers, sweep-stake horses, matched mules, spotted hogs, and the baby show, open to all not over twenty. Here you are, cost you but a nicklc. a half dime, a five cent piece. We purchased. or rather Harold purchased one, and we started looking over it, but before we had hnished, a loud bell rang which announced the opening of the games We were all attention in watching the display on the tracks. which lasted for some few minutes. Then the prizes were announced. and Rosa. Schear was awarded the blue ribbon for having the fattest spotted pig, and Rickcll the best pair of mules. Now the center of attraction seemed to be a little stand brought up in front of the grand stand. which held the beau- tiful babies. up for inspection. Ye gods! Could any one ever imagine a more terrible sight; some I know would be dee lighted to see hfty, yet posing as under twenty. I made a side remark to my friend, but alas, one of them heard it. and before I had time to utter a final prayer for salvation, I was scalped. I felt my head go off with a terrible 'slash and fall on the Floor, I opened my eyes, and found the sunlight streaming in through the window of my cabin, and looking at my clock. found it long after rising time. My alarm had gone off some time ago, and yet I did not feel like I had had any sleep. I ruhbed my eyes, tried to think, but my brain was dustyV so I sneezed and jumped out of my bunk, and dashed a bowl of ice water on my face, and then my senses gradually came hack, and I was still sailing in the Atlantic, with nothing like Hughesville in sight. MURPHY, '08.

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Hastily donning my coat, I started out for the park where I had been informed the clebrations were to take place. On a small cross street, I saw a sign, Mr, Haeckl. On in- quiring, I found him to he the man who compounds the flavoring extract used on the back of postage stamps About half a block farther, I entered the store of Miss Susie Mor- rison, who was doing a satisfactory business in butter, cheese, hour, chest protectors. hair oil, eggs, rubber boots and other luxuries She had a score of female Clerks, Dora Sounendav, Elsie Zeller, Lisetta Mittendorf, Elizabeth Wides and Ida Schaefer, who were very popular with the men, who of course paid their respects to the store. After a very pleasant stay in the store, which had lasted some time. and the noise in the streets was becoming intolerable I m0ved on, and just as I was crossing the street, mv attention was attracted by Miss Denton, who was coming in my direction She had a terrible looking thing on her arm, and on making inquiry, I found it to be her husband, and do you know, he could not look me straight in the face. for he was cross-eyed. Marie had been North, South. East and West. and wherever she went. of course she would have an occasional admirer, but the minute she had the Opportunity she began about Byron, and Byron it was in the morning and Byron it was in the evening. and when she went to a. play, she would begin about how like Byron the hero was, until she had scared all of them off; but being a very persistent old maid, she kept up her conquest, and hnally landed her fish. He had been a miner in a coal mine, without any education, and thought that per- haps Byron was some friend of George Washington. I next ran into Miss Kelsall, of whom I inquired the whereabouts of my old sehoolmatc, Huldah Guckenburger, for having spent much time together, and just a sort of rivalry having existed between them about some poor fellow who was just off his dip about Huldah, the sprite of Hughesvillel Of course, Nat would have to say that she was a lovely girl, and all that, but when she said it she would look as if sheihad tasted a lemon. But it is hard lines for a- sociable girl to sit around the house and practice finger movements on the piano and see everything lighted up across the street Huldah ale ways had a rusher of men callers, and the weather permitting, she held an over-flow meeting on the veranda. There was the proprietor of the farm and our hero, Robert Buhrman, 22 arid Bill Hall, the fellow who wrote Jr. after his name. These Were all just foolish about Huldah, but when our hero went to see her, the door-bell just kept on ringing, and he found that instead of conducting a courtship, he was simply getting in on a series of mass meetings. 50 he dropped out of the competition, and took to calling on Sarah Craig. where he found he was just the cheese. But'peach crops come and peach crops go, and the door-bell did not tingle with the' usual frequency, and Huldah. seeing that the vernal season had passed, decided to stop the Philandering, and pick one for keeps, even the meadow would look good to her. At last acounts she was supposed to he guessing. Such was the de- tail that Miss Kelsall gave me regarding her old friend, but remembering that the regular recording angel had to be laid off, and a hired first-class slenographcr put on the track when you ask one maid to discuss the other, so thanking her for her information, I passed on, making my way toward the park. At the entrance there was a very cozy looking settee, and I was counting on a nice little snooze, but it was a case of Stung again, for as I approached, I heard a kid squaling and several people talking, and always being more or less of a buttiusky, I walked on until I reached them. and who do you suppose it was Edith Tomlin, dressed as a nurse girl, sitting there talking to Ralph McGlasson, a large sized cop, and indeed I believe he was cupping her, for she never even noticed me, so I stood by and listened. It was really a shame to take the money, but I was very glad to be the first one to congratulate them, and suppose the happy event will come off in the near future. I would liked to have remained with this loving pair forever, but just then, hearing the call of a street vender: Peanuts, pop corn, candy and chewing gum; five a pack? I decided that. as I had no breakfast, some candy would not go bad, so I went to hunt the fellow up, and found it to be Arthur King. I spent ten cents of my quarter, and left him. A little farther on I was held up by Ernest Clerk, one of those guyes who owned a stand where you throw rings at canes. and if fortunate enough to ring one. it is yours. He was yelling so loud, the cane you ring, the cane you carry away,n that I really thought it was worth a. nickle, and being

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FAREWELL ANNOUNCEMEIE: 14' t DEAR SCHOOLMATES: It has always been the custom in past years for the Tatler to write a farewell, would-be-witty note to his Classmates. As it was, is now and ever shall be my policy to try to be different. I will not write a last Spec of the Spectator. I had not the chance to re veal my identity in Old Hughes. and I therefore take this opportunity to sign my name as Tatler. iu- surance inspector and statistic collector. 1' ask you to kindly remember me as one who tried to develop the humorous nature of each one of you, or to keep in condition that nature, if it was already developed. Whether I have succeeded or not. is merely a matter of opinion I bid you all God-speed in days to come, and hope you have received my efforts in the light in which they were offered. Remember me. tag the Maine said When it started for the bottomy R. L. BUHRMAN, TATLER. WW3 CURIOSITY SHOP Anxious :-No. the spots on the sun are not caused by prickly heat. Constantz----A is right. Mortar holds bricks to- gether. not apart. A. R. C. :eYes. air outside of the base line is foul. Ratesville :-To take hlack spots out of cloth, dye the whole piece black. Beany Blankenbucles:im'e refuse to answer your question. Citizen:eThere is such a bill pending in Legisla- ture at this time. It reads: Resolved that; the edges of all HMerry Widow hats shall be medicated t0 pI'E- vent eruption on skin of passersby who may scraped. CuriouszeYou question is a strange one. We think a mosquito must needs strain himself in getting through a screen door or a tine sieve. Tax-payer:-Yes, you may shoot your neighbor's dog if it licks your babyts face. TATLER.