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Page 29 text:
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“Young man,” said Mr. Raymo, as he caught Wardin by the shoulder for throwing paper wads, “I believe Satan has got hold of you.” “I believe he has,” was the reply. '¥ ¥ ¥= Miss Haller: “But it is time for the guests to leave.” Miss Austin: “Yes; that is why I want you to sing.” ¥► ¥ ? “The King of Germany,” announced the teacher in a solemn voice. “Is called the Kaiser. Now, can anyone tell me what the ruler of Russia is called?” “The Czar,” roared the class. “And what is the Czar’s wife known as?” “The Czarina.” “Ah!” said the teacher, eyeing the flock fondly, “That is very good. Now who will tell me what the Czar’s children are called?” “Czardines!” yelled one little boy, triumphantly, while the master wept. $ ¥ “Father, what do they mean by gentlemen farmers?” “Gentlemen farmers, my son, are those who seldom raise anything except their hats.”
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Page 30 text:
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Doctor: “Did that cure for deafness really help your brother?” Pat: “Sure enough; he hadn’t heard a sound for years, and the day after he took the medicine he heard from a friend in America.” ¥ ¥ Two men were hotly discussing the merits of a book. Finally one of them, himself an author, said to the other: “No, John, you can’t appreciate it. You never wrote a book yourself.” “No,” retorted John, “and I never laid an egg, but I am a better judge of an omelet than any hen.” $’ $ '¥ Father: “What did you and John talk about last night, dear?” Daughter: “Oh, we talked about our kith and kin.” Small Brother: “Yeth, Pop, I heard ’em. He seth, ‘Kin I have a kith?’ and she seth, ‘Yeth, you kin.’ ” ¥ ® S “Good-bye schoolmates, good-bye. For we are leaving Hemlock High; Its bell no more for us will ring, For we must start on some new thing.” ❖ Our Janitor Here’s to the janitor, a generous man. Who looks after the school as best he can; And whenever you meet him upon the street His good-natured smile cannot be beat. S ¥ ® She Had ’Em Student: “What are your terms for students?” Landlady: “Dead beats and bums.” $ “No,” said the honest man, “I was never strong on literature. To save my life I couldn’t tell you who wrote Gray’s Elegy.” ¥ ® «¥ Our Faculty Come in our Senior room and see Miss Austin toiling diligently; And her face a childish smile Seems speaking to you all the while. Then to our Junior room lets roam, For there you feel you are at home; Because when Miss Loynes smiles in her winning way It would make you like wanting to stay. Then across the hall we go, And into Miss Harris’s room you know, She’s charming as the morning sun, And always gives us a hearty wel-come. Then to Miss Dungey’s sewing room We journey every afternoon, While all the while we sew content, For on us Miss Dungey’s eyes are bent. Then to the left if you go You will in the office C. A. Raymo, In mathematics, physics, too, and general science, He will lead you thru. '$'? ? Edna: “Are you going to take physical training when you attend Normal?” Helen: Yes; I was always crazy about gym (Jim).” John: “Miss Harris, what is your favorite song?” Miss Harris: “When Johnny comes marching home.”
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