Grimsley High School - Whirligig Yearbook (Greensboro, NC)

 - Class of 1909

Page 59 of 96

 

Grimsley High School - Whirligig Yearbook (Greensboro, NC) online yearbook collection, 1909 Edition, Page 59 of 96
Page 59 of 96



Grimsley High School - Whirligig Yearbook (Greensboro, NC) online yearbook collection, 1909 Edition, Page 58
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Grimsley High School - Whirligig Yearbook (Greensboro, NC) online yearbook collection, 1909 Edition, Page 60
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Page 59 text:

GENERAL ITEMS ANI) STATISTICS G. II. S. 55 Central Stems anti statistics Mr. Jackson has won the Joker’s Mledal with a record of 4,987 during the term. Miss Womble and Miss Hampton, after a severe strain, have succeeded in perpetrating but three. For the student body Mr. Forney, whose motto is “Quantity not Quality,” has attempted 3,400, and successfully completed 15. “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” After unremitting labor the Statistician has completed the Flirtation Record. Uallbach leads with Scott (Robert) ... McDuffie . Porter .. Weaver . 789 302 190 187 1 After a careful examination of heads the Official Phrenologist has submit¬ ted the following report: R. C4. Merritt—Ilis bump for acquiting knowledge, bananas and long trous¬ ers is strongly marked. William Sullivan Ilis head was so M i’t that a satisfactory report is im¬ possible. Fielding Fry and Fleming Weaver — Their bum]) of soft and bowing lan¬ guage ' highly developed. •J. S. Hunter—Ilis head shows a decided inclination for finery. After his thrilling death an analysis of his brain was attempt© l. but his head was found to be entirely empty. The theory has been advanced that this was due to tlie escape of all the hot air.

Page 58 text:

a. h. s. 54 G EN ' ERA L A VISA X( ' E ORGA NIZA TION (General JMttsancr ©rgant?atton OFFICERS: Max Hendrix .. Chief Slap-mc-in-the-bach William Grimsley . The Great Pinch-and-Run Man James White . The Original Pehble-Tcsser Wallace Kirkman . JacJc-of-all-Devilmeid Murray Tate . Assistant Jack-of-all-Devilment Grey Merritt . Wing-Sprouter Frank Scarboro . Authorized Cap-Collector AYiHard Eutsler . Chief Contortionist EXTRACTS FROM CONSTITUTION The motto of the Organization shall be: “ Better not be at all than not be a nuisance.” No one is eligible for membership who attends Sunday School, or belongs to a church or Y. M. C. A. Candidates for membership must exhibit proofs of general uselessness, and must give incontestable evidence of having at least having snapped school or stolen watermelons. Statistician’s Report The Organization can now boast of the three greatest rascals in human history. Recent investigations show that Nero, Borgia and King John combined can boast of but 11,987 acts of devilment, whereas Kirkman. Tate, and Scar¬ boro are known to have committed at least 20,000. If all the pebbles and cinders tossed at unsuspecting victims by James White were collected, it has been estimated that there would be enough to com¬ pletely cover up the foot of Mr. Hendrix. It has been ascertained that Mr. Merritt has definitely given up sprouting wings and has transferred his attention to the culture of a. moustache. The most minute observer has been unable to discover a single instant in which Willard Eutsler has been perfectly still, and it has been ascertained that he has kicked the footboard out of forty-seven iron bedsteads, he being as active while asleep as while awake.



Page 60 text:

(1. II. s. 5 a GENERAL ITEMS ANl) ST A TISTICS-(Con t inved) Frank Smith—The phrenologist declines to continue the examination of his head, having got a splinter in his hand at the very outset. SOCIAL The Society Editor has handed in the following interesting figures: Number of Marie McCullen’s beaux . 437 Number of Mattie Bishop ' s beaux.. 203 Number of Louise West’s beaux (not quite) . The world’s Long Distance Talking Championship has been won by Ruth Yanstory. Her maximum record at 500 yards is 481 words per minute. The latest statistics show that the High School has yet another source of pride—the tardies. James Trogdon leads, with a record of 79 tardies out of 81 days present. As an excuse for not being tardy the remaining two days he urged that once he fell asleep in his desk and slept till next morning, thus being unavoidably on time. The other time he was so late for the day before that he did not arrive till 8 o’clock next day. Douglas Sharpe has also made a very creditable record—60 tardies in 75 days. The only Itemedy

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