Johnstown High School - Spectator Yearbook (Johnstown, PA)

Page 11 text:

THE SPECTAT OR 7 “Say, ma,” cried Tom, running in at that moment, “ Uncle Josh bought John a pair of skates, an’ I want them too, so I do. An’ ma—” “Ho, ma, Aunt Fan bought them there four blankets that you hadn’t money enough to buy. An’ she said you could never keep up to her, and that she was what might be called a big-bug.” Here Ann stopped, and Tom again plunged in. “ An’ mind you, pa, Uncle Josh said that you was mighty dumb if you thought he was goin’ to trade his hoss fur yours. ” Now pa was very sensitive if anyone spoke about his ignorance, and, since Uncle Josh had said this more than once, he became very indignant and declared that “ not anuther day should pass over his head without turnin’ the tables an’ showin’ Uncle Josh he wasn’t as green as a cab- bage head. ” Ma, although she “didn’t see why pa should git so huffy, since Aunt Fan talked so about them and went an’ bought them blankets jest fur to spite her, ” agreed to do whatever pa wanted her to. Pa had to think pretty lively “to make up a scheme to git ten dollars by the next evening and to trade his horse;” but, since he was determined, before morning he had a plan which, if all went well, would give him the required money and the coveted horse. Early the next morning ma, acting according to pa’s instructions, transformed herself into a gipsy and set out to tell Uncle Josh his fortune. When she was almost out of sight pa called after her, “ Don’t forget to tell him about his barn burnin’ last year an’ the number of cattle that burned. An’— ” “Say, ma, ” cried Tom, “tell him that John’s skates are unlucky, ’cause 1 want them, so 1 do. ” “ Don’t forget the blankets, ma, ” almost screamed Ann, as her mother turned the corner and disappeared. In answer to ma’s rap, Uncle Josh beheld a rather old woman wearing a red rag on her head and carrying two large bundles. Her skin was very dark and almost covered with blue marks. The ornaments she wore were two brace- lets, one of beads and one of silver, three silver rings and one gold one, and a pair of brass earrings. Uncle Josh kindly asked what was wanted, and ma, after a little hesitation, said she wished to tell his fortune.

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6 THE SPECTATOR Parke then related his discovery on the bank of Lake Meteor, and his subsequent capture and imprisonment. At a sign from him, two men carried up what seemed to be a bundle of women’s clothes. Upon opening them, the court was amazed to see, not the body of a woman, but the iron box in which the banker had formerly kept his wealth. Parke then related how, upon his information, the lake had been dredged and the box recovered. A great sigh of relief escaped the lips of Parke’s friends, but they were again startled by the words of the prosecuting attorney: “ Now let the gentleman tell us the whereabouts of the body of Miss Virginia Howe.” Parke again arose, and at his nod a young man, leading a girl, stepped up the aisle to the judge’s desk. She then threw aside her veil, and before the astonished eyes of all appeared the blushing face of Virginia Howe, or rather, Mrs. Charles Marie. Her story was quickly told. When the house was in an uproar of excitement over the robbery, she seized the chance to leave for a certain place, where she was met by Marie. The two then eloped, having been opposed by Mr. Howe, who thought the young man’s position in life, financially speaking, was not sufficiently elevated to aspire to the hand of his daughter. Well knowing the disposition of her father, she returned to be forgiven, which immediately happened. Parke was acquitted, and, when the reporters of the News hurried through the crowd to write up the astonishing ending of the case for their paper, J. Heresford Parke calmly said : “ Gentlemen of the News, if you want all the particulars of the case, you can easily get them by buying a copy of the extra Review, now being sold outside the door. J. Heresford Parke had made his “scoop.” E. C., ’04. A Swewp ««mnj ELL, MA, ” said Hiram Jenks,“ 1 never have luck AU- any more. Cornin’ home this evening, that old horse took anuther of them blind staggers an’ I thot he’d die ’fore I’d git home. An’ mind, Uncle Josh won’t trade fur him nuther. An’ I have to git ten dollars before to-morrow evening or we’ll be shipped out. An’—”

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8 THE SPECTATOR At first Uncle Josh refused, but at last, taking pity, told her to “ go ahead. ” After making a few queer motions and saying something under her breath, ma began. “You have had hard luck. Last year your barn burned, and with it burned two sheep, fifty chickens, four hogs, and three rabbits. ” “Well, how did you know that?” ejaculated Uncle Josh. “You will have a greater loss. 1 can’t tell you what it is, for the quarter’s worth is up, but if you’ll give me fifty more, I’ll tell all. ’’ Uncle Josh handed over the money. “Your horse will die. Your son John will break through the ice while skating and drown. Your wife bought several very beautiful blankets, which, if you keep them, will be the cause of setting your house on fire. ’’ Here she concluded her fortune and left. Ma scarcely reached home when Uncle Josh led his very fine horse into the barnyard. Pa, from the barn, seeing Uncle Josh approach, could not keep from saying, “ Dern the old cheat; here he comes already. ” Uncle Josh, seeing pa, called to him : “ Hiram, bring out your horse, for I’ve decided to trade. ” Pa immediately stepped out, leading an old, thin, big- boned horse. As he glanced at Uncle Josh’s horse, he shook his head and said, “ Gosh! that horse looks sick; but if you’ll give me ten dollars beside, I’ll trade. ” Uncle Josh, after complying with pa’s terms, told him that John was coming over to bring ma and Tom each a pres- ent- A. R. ’05. BEFORE GOING TO PRESS, the Spectator finds time to insert the program for the Emerson open meeting to be held on March 25th. It is as follows : Salutatory Oration . Anniversary Oration Political Oration . . Emerson Essay. . . Declamations . . . . Piano Solos......... Violin Solo.......... Selection........... . Earl Sorber . Ralph Bolsinger . Fred Smith . Edith Mellinger Lucy Moses I Anna Vinton Nona Swank IKinter Koontz . Matilda Utecht . Chorus