Falls City High School - Orange and Black Yearbook (Falls City, NE)

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 On the stormy night of March 14, The Alexander and Heasley “We Can Do Anything Company”, reported to the world that they had made a great discovery: A time machine that was capable of looking into the future as far as fifteen years hence. The first experimental test was looking into the future of their classmates of 1945. The following was recorded by the wonderful machine: Falls City, upon which the machine was focused, is shown to be a very changed place—the class of ’45 saw to that. As the eye wanders down the street, it arrives at the Army Ordnance plant that manufactures donut holes under the direction of the brilliant chemical engineer, Raymond Chestnut. Alvin Bahr is the chief operator of the huge mixing vats, mainly because of his vast experience mixing chemicals in Chemistry lab. Robert Fisher, aside from being janitor, follows Alvin around with a fire extinguisher, keeping him from duplicating the feat of Mrs. O’Leary’s cow, which started the CHICAGO fire. At the intersection of Jorn Avenue and Fase Boulevard is seen radio station W.O.L.F., owned and operated by Jim Knisely who has his own program from 9 to 10 P.M. giving advice to the lovelorn. Gerald “The Groaner” Wissinger, number one swoon-crooner of the nation, became an overnight sensation on that station through his ability to combine the qualities of those two foremost singers of the past—Crosby and Sinatra. Robert “One-Punch” Birch and Glenn “Strangler” Niedfeldt, two of the toughest exgangsters of Falls City, who were reformed through the efforts of the local W.C.T. U. chairman, Betty Lou Femmer, are Wiss’s protectors from his flock of bobby-socks admirers. Elda Mae and Vernell Last are the main characters on the soap-box opera The Way to a Man’s Heart is Through his Stomach.” Rear Admiral Bill Dunn of the U.S. Coast Guard stopped in Falls City on his nation wide tour to give recruiting speeches over the station. At the top of the building is a mam-mouth sign advertising “Vitamin Dyer’s Vitaminized Sauerkraut.” Vit is pulling in money hand over fist through his ambitious methods of introducing his product into the American home. To all girls interested, Vitamin is still a bachelor. We stand amazed at the next sight on the screen—it’s Georg. Brown coming down the street in the same brown Olds and still with a back seat full of kids—not her own. she is the kindergarten teacher at Harlan School. Paul Meinzer, owing to his addiction to safe and sane driving, was unanimously elected Chief of Police by his fellow citizens of Falls City, who, after his 550th wreck, decided it would be safer if “Gopher” was on their side. The biggest and burliest policeman on the force is Jerre “Smash ’Em Dead” Thompson, who brings in the worst of the criminals for Judge Edmond “30 dollars or 30 days” Nolte, to slap heavy fines on, or jail sentences. Judge Nolte began his distinguished career at the bar with a judgment against Dale Hottendorff for pasturing his cows on the court house lawn. The screen is obscured by the dust of an ambulance driven by hospital internee Max Bonsall, who is overjoyed at the thought of doing better than 30 miles an hour without fear of his car collapsing. Max grinds to a stop before a large crowd which is gathering around three figures kneeling in the dust. On closer inspection, he finds that it is a hot “GI Dominoes” game between Gene Cochrane, Don Herbster and Jack Roberts. Max tears himself away as duty calls. He finds his accident victim to be Josh Lord severly injured in an argument with his better half, Freda Jane Spafford who wouldn’t let him explain that he was only working late and not out with his blond secretary Betty Hicks. As the ambulance rushes up to the hospital entrance, Betty Dykes and Mary Lou Gilliland, efficient nurses of Doctor Harold Haeffele, who has a secret agreement with Eddie Wittrock, the towns leading mortician, undertaker to you guys, to provide Eddie with material for his practice. The machine switches suddenly from the sadder to the brighter side of life. It takes us into the Municipal Auditorium where Blanche Cain is training to defend her title of World’s champion wrestler against Pat “Bone-crusher” Loll-man, but Blanche is favored because of hidden secrets taught her by her manager Dick “Muscles” Kinsey. The referee of this exciting bout will be Edward Eck-wert. Featured in the pool is that world famous diver, Rusty Witt, who still hasn’t learned to swim. Rusty also exhibits trick underwater swimming, the trick in that he goes all the way under and stays there. Robert Nolte and

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Brown, and from what we hear, that’s quite a few. Shirley Wing leaves her singing ability to Patty Chaffee—Miss Brehm will appreciate that. Gerald Wissinger wills his basketball ability to Doug Brenner—no, maybe it’s Dave. Eugene Witt wills his title Rusty to Edna Dryer, whom the title fits better than Eugene. Edward “Cassanova” Wittrock be- queaths the love lorn looks he receives from girls to Web “Woman-hater” Todd. Marcille Zentner wills her short hand books to anyone who can decipher that code. Laura Zimmerman leaves for a better place to sleep than study hall seats, they’re too hard. Witnesses, CAROLL SCHMECHEL ROBERT LOCKARD. f

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Eugene Dorste are the life guards at the pool, and with Rusty swimming there they get a pretty good work-out every day. Next door to the auditorium is the local drug store owned and operated by Greg Kallos who is a loan shark on the side, the drug store being just a front for his illegal business. The cops don’t mind because Greg always loses money anyway. Eva Wells is the chief soda jerk. She has an invention that takes the drinks to the table, because at the rate of speed Eva travels, the ice cream was always melted before she got it there. We look for some of our other fellow classmates’ faces to appear on the screen, but we wait in vain, for we find that some of them have left the country. Bob “Grapes” Lockard, as we later learn, was last seen touring the State Home for the Feeble Minded, he hasn’t been seen since. The police are baffled by his mysterious disappearance. We also learn that Dave Duey has started an up-and-coming enterprise in New York’s Greenwich Village—Duey’s Dump starring his five dreamy dames, Carol “Hug-Me-Tight” Bertram, Helen “Come-up-and-see-me-sometime” Budeit, Gertrude “What’s-on-your-mind” Johnson, Kathleen “Cut-a-rug” Reep, and Carol “The Blue-Eyed Sweetheart” Sch-mechel. These girls decided that since they worked hard all their lives, it was time for a little fun. We spy another familiar face, it’s Laura Zimmerman, the cute little hat check girl. We next hear the call of matches—matches—it’s Carolyn Wagner the Matches Girl—matches for the cigarettes you can’t buy. Needless to say, the featured singer in this joint— er—place is Shirley Wing. Gene “Dog-meat” Brauer, the brawny bouncer who makes hamburger out of all the unruly customers, is busy throwing out John Morehead who protested that he got only ONE MEAT BALL. We journey to the local news office where we encounter Helen Ruth Kouns, owner and editor of “The Daily Waste of Ink.” Marvin Duerfeldt is the printer’s divil who gets all the blame when the paper comes out up-side-down. Mary Lou Clark is the society editor who digs up all the dirt about the citizens of this thriving metropolis. Alta Mez and Colleen Carlson are the busy reporters on the paper. You notice that all are women except Marvin—poor Marvin. Mary Ann Lessel is the owner of the Lessel Print Shop which furnishes paper for the “Daily Waste of Ink.” Her two able assistants, Margaret and Mary Ann Neimeyer, are kept busy scouring the streets of Falls City for any scraps of paper that might be salvaged, because, as the result of the paper shortage, Mary Ann is hard pressed for materials to use in her printing business. Darold Shafer is the head printer, directing the efforts of his two understudies, Marcille Zentner and Edna Weber, from a comfortable seat in a corner, where he sits reading “Esquire”, except on Saturday which is pay day. One of the most thriving establishments which we discover is the “Noll Model Agency.” Larry, because of his vast research into the field of feminine beauty, decided to organize a model agency comprising those girls whose talents he had most thoroughly investigated. Among the models who are rapidly threatening Harry Conover’s and John Power’s monoply on beautiful girls are: Ada Richardson, Colleen Ridgeway, Dorothy Waddle, Jerrilee Williams and Rho-lene Eickhoff. “Bulldog” confides to his friends that this new enterprise is most interesting, and he finds that it occupies most of his time. According to statistics, after World War II women began to rapidly out number men, a direct outcome of this was woman’s rise to prominence in the political world. Examples of this we see are: Catherine Steele, who on the “Women Arise” ticket, ran a close second to her male opponent. Catherine’s only statement to the press was a grim warning: “Wait till next time!” Catherine’s campaign manager, Phyllis “The TNT Kid” Lundy, when interviewed in the back room of Ohse’s Oasis, where she was drowning her sorrows in mug after mug of foaming buttermilk, stated, quote, They can’t last forever—I hope.” Unquote. Phyllis Walbridge has been appointed ambassadress to Shangri La. Congresswoman Evelyn Niedfeldt is working for improved living conditions for baby pigs. Through the kindness of booking agent Jaunita Oberst, Falls City was very fortunate in obtaining the services of the dancing team of Meredith and Fredrick, better known as June Thompson and Fred Werner. After this last view, we switch the machine off, having obtained a bird’s eye view of the future of our classmates of 1945. SARA SUE ALEXANDER HAROLD HEASLEY