Fairfield High School - Comet Yearbook (Columbiana, OH)

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FAIRFIELD TWP. HIGH CLASS PROPHECY SCENE-On board the Bowman Super Rocket Ship Model V 8-8-8-Plus Super 8, fifty miles in the stratosphere. TIME-May 25, 1965, 18 o'clock Eastern Standard Mars Time. PASSENGERS-Larry Bable, Lauren Bowman, Donald Clark, and Ray Taylor. OBJECT OF JOURNEY-To find four new planets for the sake of humanity. After the boys ride for about five minutes they discover four planets: Hubba Hubba Planet by Larry, Ding-Ding by Lauren, Bo-ing by Donald and Erf Planet by Ray. The boys explore the new planets till about supper time and they decide to knock off to eat. Each reaches into his pocket for vitamin pills and calorie hypodermics, and in one minute flat their meal is completed. During their rest after supper they begin to talk about the good old times they had in F. H. S., and to wonder what happened to the class of '46. Well! as the four boys knew, Lauren was a great manufacturer of the Bowman Super Rocket Ships who specialized in V 8-8-8-Plus Super 8 Models. Donald was a traveling salesman who went to Mars, Pluto, Juipter, etc., selling Smiths Hair Tonic and Cough Drops. Ray Taylor decided to be an undertaker, because with all the new jet propelled planes, helicopters and jeepettes there would be quite a few accidents and he would have quite a stiff business. Larry Bable is the National Judge of Beauty Contests, and also a talent scout for Faramount Studios. Some of you may be interested to know that Larry married the beautiful actress, Jean Crain. Donald said, I hear Carol Cullar is Master of Ceremonies on station M-A-R-S. She is leader of the Mars Rhythm Rangers. Say what ever happened to Pro Dailey? Larry continued, Why Pro is now inventor and manufacturer of vitamin pills and hypodermics. It pays to advertise you know and Pro really goes to extremes. The other Sunday at church the congregation was asked to sing page 125, and these are the words that appeared: Hark the Herald angels sing, Pro Dailey's pills are just the thing Peace on earth and Mercy mild Two for men and one for childf, Finally Ray spoke up with, You know, boys, Mildred Doss married I. C. Rumblesnitz and they now have two sets of twins. The girls are named Zada Ruth Rumblesnitz and Dorothy Loretta Rumblesnitz. The boys are named Thomas Virgil Rumblesnitz and Louis Atlee Rumblesnitzf' Yeh! I heard that too, said Lauren, but did you know that Leland Houlette is rival of Senator Claghorn or Martin Chmura, who is President of Mars? Leland owns a great coon farm and also specializes in odorless polecatsf' Say what ever happened to Myrna Cullar and Dorothy Farmer? Don asked. I was just about to tell you, Don, said Larry. Dorothy is a great adventurer in Mars. Her partner is Myrna and theylre the greatest game hunters in the universe. So far they have killed or captured Z0 Oomaloos, 6 Goofers and 8 Ellapants. The other day Myrna shot a wolf. They seem to be having the time of their lives, not a care in the world. Oh! well that's a woman for you. Did you fellows hear Tom Grubbs over the radio the other night? said Ray. He is the greatest funny man of the air-waves, even the greatest swooner. Hubba! Hubba! Page 25

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THE CREST OF 1946 CLASS WILL On behalf of my client, the class of '46, of Fairfield Township School, of the township of Fairfield, State of Ohio, the United States of America, Planet Earth, I present you on this serious and solemn occasion, the last will and testament of said client. Since my client has been ill with a headache in his stomach, a toothache in his big toe, and many other miscalculations, he asked me to state that he may have made some errors, but urges that you except this heritage as a sacred trust from one who precedes you to the Great Beyond. I, the class of '46, hereby dispose of my estate as follows: ARTICLE I ITEM 1.-We will to our Superintendent and Faculty members, fond memories of the class of '46, ITEM 2.--To Slim,' we leave a clean school house, with no eraser dust on the walls. ITEM 3.--To Helen Fahndrick we will and give our financial reports, hoping she'll be able to straighten them out, because we can't. We'll also leave her a bottle of aspirin. ARTICLE II We give and bequeath to the Junior class our beautifully carved desks, chalk and erasers, hoping they'll make good use of them next year. We give and bequeath to the Sophomores our ability to obey and get things done in a hurry. We bequeath to the Freshmen our undying happiness, and ever-forward ability to do right. We will the oncoming Freshmen our sophisticated manner of behaving in the cafeteria line. ARTICLE III Larry Bable-bequeaths his great technique of wooing the girls to Billy Geis. Warren Bland-contrariness to Cy Bauman. Lauren Bowman-wills his curly hair to Virgil Kornbau. Martin Chmura-bequeaths his eloquent speeches to Walter Oscar', Smith. Donald Clark-wills his intelligent look to Eddie Miller. Alvah Dailey-wills his Charles Atlasu build to Jackie Bussard. Tom Grubbs-wills his explosive jokes to Douglas Moore. Tom Hess-bequeaths his seriousness to Walter DeRhodes. Leland Houlette-wills his coon hunting to any of rhe boys who like to roam around at night. Elmon Smith-wills his quietness to Paul Conkle. Ray Taylor-wills that come hither look to Billy Rymer. Joan Burt-wills her ability to get an engagement ring to Lois Ray. Mary Carter-wills her slim figure and natural curly hair to Rebecca Korgau. Carol Cullar-wills her dimples to Jenny Vollnogle, - . Myrna Cullar-wills her gigles to Clara Miller. Mildred Doss-wills her ability to get any man to Frieda Rae Garwood. Dorothy Farmer--wills her love of dancing to Gus Reash. Rosemary Fireston?wills her ability of working hard and hurrying to Shirley Conkle. Evelyn Miller-wills her shorthand ability to Leon Taylor. Juanita Troll-wills her typing ability to Lawrence Waters. Mary Webber-wills her reading ability to Richard Rice. We hereby declare this to be our official will and testament and do therefore attach our honorable signatures. THE SENIORS-CLASS OF 1946 Page Z4

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THE CREST OF 1946 You know I heard the funniest joke the other dayf' said Lauren. I heard that Mary Carter is one of Hollywood's most beautiful actresses and singers. With her beautiful slim l?l figure she can make any bathing suit look good, or was it any bathing suit can make Mary look good. I stopped at Warren Bland's the other day, said Don, He invents small gadgets helpful to the housewife. Now in his spare time he is working on a parachute that will go both up and down. What won't he think of next? By the way Warren is not married. Then Ray spoke up, Rosemary Firestone is happily married to Mr. U. R. Crazy. They are the proud parents of a little girl. The other day while driving through town, Rosemary was caught in a traffic jam. A cop said, 'Use your noodle, lady, use your noodlef Then Rosemary replied, 'My goodness, where is it? I've pushed and pulled everything in the car '. I saw Mary Webber at Faddison Square Garden the other day, said Larry. She is one of the greatest figure skaters of all times. She's an expert at the figure 88. I also saw Joan Burt who is now married to Bud Shive, and is turning her attention to carinz for the little Shives. When I saw them the other day it was the oldest daughter's birthday. She said to me, 'Today is my birthday.' And I said, 'And to think in another year, you'll be one year olderf' She replied, 'Never mind about the future! How about the present'?', Elmon Smith, said Ray, is the owner and manufacturer of the 'Smith Brothers, Company specializing in hair tonic and cough drops. Don, here, is one of his traveling salesmen. I Evelyn Miller is now a teacher at Fairneld University. She has a Master's Degree in aeronautics. Some of her pupils are the children of the members of the class of '46. Two of her pupils are the children of Tom Hess. Tom is one of America's leading citizens. Before he was married he was another Dr. Anthony solving love problems. Now since he is married, he has changed his vocation to being water commissioner of Fairfield Township. Ol-i! and last but not least, said Larry, Juanita is now President of Notre Dame, the college for boys. She is very well 'known in society. The other day while launching a ship, she turned to the shipyard manager and said, 'How hard do I have to hit it to knock it into the water? ' Weill said Don, we better be getting back to earthy it's getting dark and we have to tell about our discovery for humanity. Come on. QD