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Page 29 text:
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chow And we tan be heroes .lust for one das Dastd Bowte Oh sweet mssters ot ltle At last lse found sou Jeanette NItDonald 'No one knows for sure whs or how tt all gan It was a untque phenomenon that now balled oser four sears The eondtttons sere rtght The ttmtnv was rtvht And Chow merged front the masses as a ltstnv breath g tcon to freshman fttrls A leader oftotks 1 freshmen fantass a Basketball Hero No htstors of our eolleve sears would be tecuratels completed wtthout an acknowl dgement of the Chow Ssndrome Vans hase had thetr theortes Some hase rante of contemplatton lThose were the reshman gtrls I But no one could dens that titer four sears of watthtnv sarstts basket Jall there was a eertatn amount of reltet tn snowtnff that Chow had the ball and esen tmtd plasers of octastonalls comparable yualtts sou just knew that sou weren t 'bout to see somethtnv tncredtbls stuptd tappen Was be that ktnd ot eonsolatton Is qualttt atton for herotsm Regardless heroes wtll ome and go But there wtll neser be ar' mther Chow Namesltke Chow just dont tappen twtee al cinder-block l had a dream the other ntght I dreamed was sleeptng tn a hallwas tn Spange hud 'led on the ttle floor so that one stde of ms ace sort of clung to the surface I felt ms -and brush agatnst the rough etnder block wall and shuddered wtth the realtzatton that was encased tn stone Then I heard a fatnt straptnv sound Nloments ol stlen-.e p1ssed as ms sktn Drew told and eltmms Just as I peeled the rtvht stde of ms late ott ot the floor to lease thts eerte mausoleum the hall beeame ttlled wtth the sound ol shttttnv un der blotk lt was that unmtstakable notse the one sou hear on Stoobs Doo when eser thes open a setret passave was tn a psramtd or ease or somethtnv The wall were altse l was frozen wtth terror And thep 'lms ot ms hands were ktnd ot stutk to the floor too Eath ttnder blotk h d taken on tts own btt ot tonsttousness and somehow tn thetr ehtlltnv motton seemed to express esers th tnv estl one mtffht suspett from ttnder blotk You ll neser be able to hanv a ptt ture exattls where sou w 1nt tt on a ttnder blotk wall thes emoted lt takes mush more patnt to Loser a ttnder bloek room en wtth a tolletttse tts stare t ese rot s eonsesed wtth sh tttertn-1 tlartts tust how well a ttnder blotk wall eals tn the wtnter ttme told lt was at thts potnt that thes bevan to edve toward me seraptnv methodttal's lowls seratthtnv the told ttle tloor COTE Bob wanted to be eomputer mator He was hesttant to vo to ENC betause he knew tt would mean taktnv a lot ot glasses he wasn t neeessartls tnterested tn Alter 1ll thouffht Bob l want to be a tomputer pro Orammer and make mans thous ands ot dol lars Bob w tped the saltsa from the torners ot hts mouth H hat tare l about ltterature and thtnffs aesthettt The ENC reerutter dtd all he tould wtth out lstnv outrtvht to persuade Bob ot the benettts ot a Chrtsttan ltberal arts eduta tton He esplatned how our spettttt turrttu lum teathes students not onls how to do a eertatn tob but how to ltse He went on to explatn how mans students arent sure at ttrst what lteld tnterests them the most and the ENC Lore exposes them to some ot es ersthtnv Ftnalls as tt betame apparent that Bob would not be tonstneed the reerutter wrapped ht ttnvers around Bobs throat lttted htm oft the floor 1nd ptnned htm to the wall ravtnv tnto hts late There ls no eonllttt between the best tn edueatton and h best tn Chrtsttan tatth Got that Bob None Releastnv hts Urtp he allowed Bob to sltde tnto a trembltnv mass on the floor And then he lett paustnv onls to sptt on Bob s shoes Bob went to Another Leadtnv Boston Area .bthool There he Got ht devree tn tomputers wtth relattsels ltttle exposure to edutatton ot ans other sort lPhew 2 Now Bob had an tnterstew for a sers lutrattse posttton wtth a Laroe Computer Ftrm Lpon dtseosertnv that tt had been narrowed down between htm and another applteant ENC Graduate Bob s tonltdenee Grew to trrttattng proporttons Bob stepped tnto hts prospetttse emplos er s ofltte tor a ttnal tnterstew Stt down Bob Care for a ttgarette ' the prospeettse emploser querted warmls Hhs ses thank sou satd foul habtt plagued Bob That s a ptts Bob satd the prospetttse emploser 'He don t muth ltke foul habtts around here Your bods ts a temple Dtdn t ansone eser tell sou that Bob ' H ell He ll UlUsI oserlook that for now The prospeettse emploser made a notatton on a ptece ofpaper before htm Tell me Bob W hat do sou know about Immanuel Kant and the 'sloral lmperattse' H no ou know lmn pta sophe wh1be'tese 11 01 n bsotute rule or et sou J wt nv t1 see , tet. s 1ta n w t t t t, 1 t persptr 'ton l1 d pre d e Ts on tront l1 sntntnf' upper t es ttse emploser made '1 h Ich l' ls T7 ' s. nu kwtulls dvrned n teueh D nt sou t tnk sO bla c bt X moment ot stlent t s et. 'not er rn rk was made on the '11 r lb dont sou brtells outltne tor nn e est. leadtn up I7 Btsmarek s bt snnert eontrol ot Germans te sot. s t tut nswertt 1st Ucs' 1 Do sou beltese there t Hts tontlttt betweer the best tn edut ton nd he bes. tn h ttan tftth o Uasped nd tnsttrt Url ed to protest ht thro t Het 0 o sou o sou ob Answe me Q o sou Bob Bob Sltdtnv from hts eh Bob pl hed lt htls tnto pool ot hts own swell her he made 1 Our-fltn-1 sound nl sltthtered from the otttte The prospetttse emploser r111de one rno . not1tton on the paper 1 dtdn t et that lutr t sepostt on w h the L1r-Je Computer Ftrm Thte ENC duate wh 1 h d re1d The Odssses 1nd knew l a out lndta s uste ssstem td e Xloral ness sou w nt t ooltnv p upon trem tnv sssel stammertnv swetts was tnv swelts mr tnv sltt ertns sltme take tds vntave 1 ENC Lore nd remember There Is no tontltet between the best tn edut ttton 1nt. the best tn Chrtstwn t1tfh Crusader man 1 g . . . M.. t . U S' g 1 1 14. 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Page 30 text:
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dance Up in Heaven s happy portals Where the parties never stop All the debonair immortals Do a dance called the Heaven Hop ln this great Celestial Center lt s the only dance they do So before you try to enter You better start doing it too Cole Porter dlet soda Some of our favorite low drinks are Diet Coke Diet Pepsi Ta Sugar free Sprite Diet Slice Diet Ramblin Rootbeer Diet 7 Up calorie dorms a poem by Mary Heliotrope Wea therbea ter. Dorms are special. Dorms are nice. Some ha ve bunk-beds. Some have mice. Some ha ve cracks that Climb the walls. Some have poems on Bathroom stalls. Some ha ve three floors. Some ha ve four, I ha ve keys to Each one 's door. Some of us Return each night To sleep in dorms With halls too bright Some hang out the Whole day through In dorms quite often Like a zoo Dorms are nice u Dorms aren t fr Summer rent is Robbery Winter rent is better though lWe ve no other Place to go J Dorms ha ve roommates Dorms ha ve friends and Flights of stairs that Never end So to stay I ll Get a loan In some sick way Dorms are home TZ!! 26fDictionary don't Don't drink. Don 't smoke I t What do you do? Sudden innuendo follows Must be something inside . , . - Adam Ant Don't can be defined from many van-i tage points. Do not. Refrain From. You are forbidden . . . l' Certainly, it is a word we tend to run up against a lot. Briefly, I have compiled a list of some of our all- time favorite Don'ts : Don 't Dance. Don 't go to movies. Don 't park on campus. Don t skip chapel. Don t even TOUCH the Ere extinguishers Don tgo in the dorms occupied by the oppo site sex Don t throw water out of windows Don t wear shorts in the cafe Don t make noise after eleven P M Someday when we re older we ll look back on these restrictions and laugh And we will say Yes I think I ll send my kids to ENC the brats elsewhere Spring break is approaching You lie con templa tively on your bed and suddenly bolt upright with the horrifying realization that you ha vent been off campus since Febru ary You sit white knuckled on the edge of your bed sick of your roommate sick of your major sick of your radio station You try to study but you find yourself un consciously scribblmg things like GET ME OUTTA HERE' in the margins You throw on your jacket with increasing aware ness that you ve gone stir crazy Now you are a student in distress In an attempt to make a speedy exit you hnd it s already time to sign out I Time flies when you re having a crisis j Your name The time Destination An automatic re sponse OUT ELSEWHERE I guess its king of like Nirvana or an apathetic sort of Hea ven As you walk run drive flee from campus you Und your self with only one purpose Escape Thats the nice thing about Elsewhere you can 1 get lost looking for it And the minute you get out from the shadow of Gardners ivy covered walls you ve found it Suddenly you can breathe again Deadlines evaporate Its almost like real freedom almost
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