East High School - Redjacket Yearbook (Pawtucket, RI)

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FOOTBALL TEAM, J9J7.

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18 Pawtucket High School Class Hook—1918. toenails to baldness. It is safe for him to advertise “absolutely harmless for his medicine consists of distilltd water, colored red, and flavored to suit the taste. Sidney Simons is Conary's advertising agent. Walter Connly's knowledge of every cigarette makes him an expert tobacco drummer. Since “Yolly gets a discount on all his smokes, this profession considerably cuts down his living expenses. The name of the great biologist. Howard Loring Curtis, is often heard in our midst. Howard acquired his fame, when after fourteen years of experiments, he discovered that gold fish do not enjoy moving pictures. After a hard day’s work in his laboratory Howard returns home to Dorothy Cheek, who has long since been his wife. Constance Capron became one of the leading society women of Newport. She inherited a million dollars from a distant relative and thereby won the love of the Hon. Louis R. Devoe for life, or rather as long as the million lasted. Bob McElroy's adventurous nature yearned for excitement. He travelled around the world a few times and finally landed in Costa Rica. 1 lere a revolution was brewing and Bob took the side of the revolutionists. After they had overthrown the government the revolutionists elected Bob president. Soon after his election Bob bought the “Pontiac and made Charlie Driscoll admiral, with the “Pontiac for a flagship. He then looked around for a good general and finally chose “Pete Gardner to fill the office. The Costa Rican army now has twenty-three generals and five privates. Bill Duclos went to Texas and started a ranch. He intended to raise high class cattle but discovered extensive oil fields on his lands. His wells now produce so much oil that he has broken the Standard Oil Company’s monopoly. Sidney Jackson is now handling Duclos' business while Bill enjoys his fortune. Everett McAlevy rose in the newspaper business. His “Pawtucket American’’ drove the “Times” completely out of business . The motto of the paper is “We print everything but the truth.” Mac’s scientific gassing can get advertisements from the biggest tightwads. Carl Flick is the leading cartoonist for the “Pawtucket American . On every corner people can be found laughing at “Flick's Funnies . McAlevy hired Raymond Mara for sales agent. « Arthur Korcier and Henry Whipple have become known the country over as expert auditors and accountants. Henry thinks it nothing at all to add on a paltry ten thousand to make his books come out all right. Altho Oreal Grossman and John McGreevy have not made fortunes for themselves, they have at least made themselves famous. The two went to Russia and founded a bank. (John had some difficulty in mastering the intricacies of the language but it came natural to Oreal. I Just as the bank began to make money, the Bolsheviks raided it and “swiped the deposits. John and Oreal have returned to this country in bankruptcy. Albert Holburn and Byron Stapleton are well known scientists. Working together they have produced wonderful chemistry text books. Albert remembered his own dislike for chemistry formulas at P. H. S. and refused to have any rules, formulas, or laws in any of his books. Needless to say the books are in great demand especially by students. The two scientists are now on research work trying to discover foods that will not burn for use in the 11 igh School domestic science department. The two tellers of this sorrowful tale state that they did not make all their classmates millionaires on account of a shortage of space. One of the two colleagues suffered a mental relapse and retired to Miss Cushman’s Sanitarium. The other showed the utter hopelessness of his case hy experimenting on a perpetual motion machine. I laving solved the eternal question he equipped an aeroplane with his new motor and started on a trial flight. The machine was a remarkable success. In fact, the motor was so perpetual that the inventor could not stop it. When last seen he was travelling at a tremendous speed towards a distant planet carrying with him the solution to the mystery of perpetual motion. Agnes Rebecca Doherty. 1 forace Boss Pray.

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20 Pawtucket High Schooi. Ci.ass Book—1918. WILL OF THE CLASS OF 1918 Knout all Hint by these presents, HAT, we, the class of nineteen-eighteen of the Pawtucket High School, being of our usual sound, disposing, and even generous mind and memory since it does not effect our pocketbooks, do hereby make, publish, and declare this to be our last will and testament. First: To the class of 1919, our successors through unfortunate circumstances over which we have no control, we give and bequeath the following: All our debts which we request they shall pay promptly. The right for the coming Senior track team to dignify its practise under the name of Interclass Meet. The right to appoint certain of its members to lead the “pie-eating bunch” to the rendezvous, console Sophs who rip their trousers on the fence, call the doctor, and render first-aid generally. The right to stir Mr Hosmer to the “murdering place” by thinking of a Freak Day. The right to officiate next year at the annual scuttling of the good ship “Lyceum ’ ’. The privilege to consider moral right and ethics in making important class decisions. The privilege of trying trig, for the usual time—a week. The privilege of acting-out “Macbeth”, and “murdering sleep” with “dag gel's of the mind”. The privilege of trying to learn to decline and use ego as well as we have. These things we give and bequeath to tin class of 1919, on the condition that the profits on said class’s Junior Dance be appropriated as a subsidy to the lunch counter in its price-slashing competition with Kelly’s Pie Emporium. Second: We give and bequeath to 1920: The privilege of a few of its members having a Cook of their own. The customary Junior right to “bully” the teachers. Customary right of same class to “bluff” at nine o’clock and wonder at one. Another customary right of same class to look into Bunsen burners to see if they are lit. Third: To the class of 1920 we bequeath: The self considered importance of Juniors, which will be all they can handle for a year. Fourth: To the class of 1921 we bequeath: A continuance of their right to hold football practise on the lawn.