East High School - Cardinal Yearbook (Minneapolis, MN)

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Auditorium Hlf bell rings. There is a mad rush for the auditorium. The innocent observer. caught in the onrushing torrent of students seeking front seats is madly pushed, pulled. or jerked into the assembly hall. ln spite of the incon- venient circumstances. our friend has taken due notice of all the interesting things about him. lie sees a group of girls just ahead of him. lie hears the following in rapid suc- cession 2 l think auditorium is lots of fun. -'llow many periods will be skipped? - l've got to study Virgil. - Who's going to talk? XYhat will it be about? I hope he takes a long time. Still, long talks are a bore. but then it takes time. lYe don't have to listen. -i'-Xren't those puffs awful? Look at that dress! etc.. etc.. without rhyme or reason. The observer watches this group. They take seats near the back. Their chatter con- tinues in subdued stage whispers. Mr. Webster scans the horizon. .Xfter a pause he be- gins. The sky darkens. Mr. XYebstcr frowns. The storm breaks. Mr. XYebster has stopped, and in terms of utmost severity asks those girls right down there in the middle of the room to stop whispering. The girls are thoroughly ashamed and repentant. The rest of the students are sur- prised and thankful that they were not the guilty ones. This time the observer muses. Yes. of course the girls did not intend any harm. That excuse is shopworn. To be sure. they were thoughtless, but young people must be taught that courtesy is the tirst es- sential of good breeding. The auditorium period is arranged for the benefit of the students of the East High School. XYhen they attend that assembly. they do so to receive information and knowl- edge. ln return. their undivided attention is demanded by the speaker. whoever he may be. lt would seem that respect for Mr. XYehster alone would be sutticient. In any public meeting, auditorium. debating contests, class plays. or any branch of school activity. the students attend to be instructed or entertained. The smallest offering in return is absolute attention. lf you come to laugh and talk. while others are making an earnest effort. our advice is stay zitvuy. 7G 3 Caps and Gowns .XPS and gowns or not caps and gowns, is a question over which liiryan himself would surely wax oratorical. It is a burning question beside which woman suffrage seems minor, indeed. It is pressing an early solution, or this great Democracy will fall to rack and ruin. The great leaders of the opposition declare that the gowns will make the girls look too old, just like the university graduates. Oh horrors! Such a thought must be a haunting nightmare. Never. never, shall our sweet. conhding. youthful. blushing. bashful children assume the appearance of aged and decrepit university students. A second argument is that the gown could be worn upon one occasion only. Oh, no: such a delusion is misleading. for there is our university graduation at which all must wear cap and gown. Even if the cap and gown are not worn. what girl would so forget herself as to overlook the transcendent importance of a graduation dress? XVho would be so cal- fm.-.

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9512 iivl-EDITORIAL U The Water Tank lllf water tank is the lfountain of Youth. not by content. but by association. Xvhat wretched imbecile. banished from class by an irate teacher, has not sought refuge and companionship at this benevolent container of liquid refreshment? Then again. when wandering aimlessly through the halls. upon being spied hy those who should be busily at work developing bumps of knowledge. how quickly you are overcome by a burning thirst! That lumbering. loaling slouch is quickly thrown aside. Xvith an attitude characteristic of one who has a definite and justifiable purpose in view, you partake of the sparkling beverage. How often, when the lines of Virgil which you have not translated are reached. do you quickly arise, with a look of untold agony. and go out to the water tank to chuckle with your friend! How at recess the crowd of youthful humanity loving' ly embrace this familiar object. for lack of other means of support! lint remarks someone. Hthose cups are just full of germs. and l'm afraid of the water. ,Xhl We understand you now. You are a Freshman. Xkihat, wretchl Do you not know that this moisture dispensary emanates from the school board? liverything which now comes from the school board must he pure and undefiled. The investigation has given us this benefit. Moreover. the great mass of red tape. through which everything coming from the school board must pass. serves as a filtration plant of wonderful efficiency. ,Xh, no. my dear. the water tank is scientifically and educationally unadulterated. Then, verily, we assert that the water tank. the greatest institution of Democracy. for all people look alike to the water tank. is the fountain of youth. of hope, of inspiration. 'Tis the friend of a youth in need.

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loused, so utterly out of harmony with the spirit of graduation, as to assume that a grad- uating robe could be worn on any other occasion? But how unimportant this seemingly important question is! Does it interfere with, or benefit, the male members of the class? Answer us that, and we shall be interested at once. But patriotism makes this suggestion: lVhy should not the costumes be in the school colors? lYhat could be more beautiful than to see our lovely maidens adorned in snow-white gowns with fiaming red caps coyly resting on their heads and a scarlet tassel over one ear? And the valiant youths with white duck suits and crimson hosiery? This would be a glori- ous spectacle! Once seen. never forgotten! Five hundred performers and trained ani- mals! Performances afternoon and evening! Parade every morning! Tickets fifty cents! C C5i9 Crying Needs HAT is this awful clamor? asked a stranger as he entered East High School one day. Oh, answered the Senior, Hthat shriek issues forth from the Statue of Minerva. She is demanding that she be cleansed of the filth which now begrimes her plaster robes. The moaning and wailing you hear comes from the auditorium. It is the call of those big white blotches on the side wall. for paint to cover their pallid nakedness. The awful rumbling comes from the annex. That culmination of 2oth century mastery in architecture. the annex! Une rumble is for those beautiful soft wood, grey-painted front doors, the other for that death-dealing cliff-stairway with those limb-wrecking swinff doors. . D N This. in part. explains the awful clamor that you hear. G 5JCfi'D HE class of Nineteen Hundred Nine does not presume to call itself the best that ever graduated from East High School. Besides. we would be too modest to assert the claim, upon every occasion, with that arrogance so characteristic of graduating classes. The class of Nineteen Hundred Nine, however, has stood for certain definite ideals in high school life. These ideals have not been smothered in meaningless class mottoes: progressive action has followed their conception. The things we have attempted to do have been bigger, better. more lasting than those undertaken by preceding classes. XYe have done this, not to crown our efforts with extraor- dinary pomp and external brilliancy. but to set a higher standard of real actual worth. Wie have sought to accomplish those things which have a definite significance. and a permanent value. School spirit and earnest. enthusiastic endeavor in all branches of school activity have characterized the members of the Senior class. Everything which tends to make our school life broader. more comprehensive, has been encouraged and urffed 'ilo U. fm S 1 nas Perhaps the best evidence of the standards we have tried to establish may be found in the selection of the Senior class play. lYeary of the interesting, but valueless. high school vaudeville. we sought for something classic. It was found in Tom Pinch, the dramatized version of Dickens' novel 'flffartin Chuzzlewitf' Though, of course, the pro- duction was essentially the work of amateurs, it showed earnestness and sincerity. The