Davidson College - Quips and Cranks Yearbook (Davidson, NC)

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made, but the members had managed to arrange themselves so that each looked (mentally) a different way from all the rest, and not one would consent to change, but insisted on following his own nose if it led him to the dread abode of Tartarus. The presi- dent appealed to us to break this magic spell and turn some pair of men in the same direction. Cicero (always looking his own way) rose first, and with burning eloquence, interspersed with vehement gest- ures, said : Men, gentlemen, Freshmen : This [his way] is the way, the right way, the only way, and every other way leads another way, a wrong way, a different way from this way which leads to all the medals, for which I will give you a chance, etc., etc., ad infinitum, and with a polite bow took his seat. Then Brass arose with a clang and rattle, and, stamp- ing;- his foot with great emphasis, said : In but few words and with great deliberation, sirs, I shall dis- close to you my deliberations as to the possibilities and probabilities of our ever reaching sufficient una- nimity to proceed to any uui — ' Here the reporter asked for time, and the Goat gave a cough which so agitated the house that the effect of Brass ' elocpience was destroyed. Then came forward Solomon, of well- known wisdom, and said: Aw now, eh, just yes, well, you see, we just must, eh, go some way and now I don ' t see any way but mine, ' ' and sat down ' mid thunders of applause. As all seemed to be convinced that we could now go ahead. Deacon rose to make a motion, but was inter- rupted by the entrance of what seemed to be the grandfather of the college. Bowed and stricken he entered leaning on a student who had just returned from a flying trip to Charlotte, and limping heavily because of his gouty pedal extremity, which he had done up in cotton and enclosed in a number eleven carpet slipper. On closer inspection, however, it proved to be none other than Fox, who happened to be late. After this interruption it was moved to adjourn, but as a majority could not be secured it was decided to make a day of it. We were helped out of this dilemma, however, by the fact that there were wafted across the campus the first words of a very familiar ditty: Oh, you Fresh, you had better lie low. For once a motion was unanimously carried by the class of ' 95. We voted by rising. This meeting was the only event of importance dur- ing the year. Commencement came and went as commencements always do, and sixty Freshmen were planted in all the pomp and splendor of a Thursday Night. These seed did not sprout men as quickly as the Dragon ' s Teeth of Cadmus, but when they did forty-six Sophomores was the result. No doubt these new 7 -born creatures would have wrought dire destruc- tion on each other had their violence not been turned into other channels. Since roast pig, chickens and guineas were not so plentiful as they once were, they ate one Freshman every night for supper until the cold weather began. It was suggested then that by treating them and their rooms (the Freshmen ) with a certain sulphurous compound they would keep until spring. But the judgments of man are erroneous. While the appetites of the Sophomores of ' 95 were ruined by long fasting, the Freshmen, on account of their unusual freshness, were entirely spoiled and unfit for anything but to be planted for another crop of Sophomores. As the Sophomore year of the class of ' 95 began to wane, President Wardlaw called a meeting, in which we determined, with all due solem- nitv, that it was our duty to sow the seed for next 24

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HISTORY OF THE CLASS OF 95. The ancients tell us that when a historian begins to tell of past events, Clio, the muse of history, hovers over him to inspire his mind and guide his pen in truth and justice. Craving this aid, the historian of ' 95 has listened through two long hours for the still small voice of this deity, but the air is silent and his mind continues blank. He would not chastise her, for well he knows with what infinite patience she has striven to lubricate certain other rusty wheels and cause to flow with steady stream the course of three other historical and historic narratives. With- out her aid, therefore, the history of ' 95 must be placed before the public. In the beginning of the term 1891-92 there began to settle over the campus of Davidson College a green- ish-tinged cloud, which slowly and steadily enveloped the hill as if the Olympians, attracted by our classic shades, wished to change the place of their abode and henceforth feast on tar instead of nectar. This, how- ever, was not really the case, for when the cloud lifted and the sun again appeared there were discovered sixty-one beings disporting themselves lightly about the campus. It was supposed by all that they had been sent down by a special order of Jove, but since the oracle has been discontinued, of course none could learn the true state of the case. For several hours this merry and unsophisticated crowd of stran- gers wandered thoughtlessly around, entirely oblivious of the fact that the earth was occupied and not entirely their own, until suddenly a horde of natives, com- monly called Sophomores, rushed from holes in the wall and proceeded to remind the visitors that since they were on the earth they must become earthy. Thus was ushered into the history of Davidson the class of ' 95, which, besides being the largest class that has assembled here for twenty-five years, is unique in several other particulars. When our college course began ' 95 put a man on the honor-roll, when our col- lege course ends ' 95 will put the college on the honor- roll. We as men were social beings ; therefore after becoming pretty thoroughly acquainted helping each other wring clothes, pick off cat-tails and deodorize rooms, we proceeded to organize, sub rosa, electing Mr. S. W. McKee, president, Mr. F. H. Wardlaw, vice-president, and Mr. W. M. Fairley, secretary and treasurer. We expected that as soon as we had done this we could begin operations, remodeling the col- lege, making new rules for the professors and elect- ing a new body of trustees. Several suggestions were 23

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year ' s crop. On the Saturday night before commence- ment the spirit of Sophomority tore the class of ' 95, and as the evil spirit of old went into the swine, this one went into the class of ' 96, which immediately rushed into the ocean. They were not drowned, however, for they were tossed out by the indignant fish, who refused to cohabitate with such compounds as Freshmen imbued with the spirit of Sophomores. After vacation we returned forty-three strong, still the largest class in college. When we were Freshmen we had tasted success in athletics, then we polished the diamond with the class of ' 94. In the session ' 92-93 we had also put several victories to our credit. But never, during our college course, has there been such an athletic zeal as there was during the fall of ' 93. Football carried every- thing before it, and of course the class of ' 95 carried the football. We were very partial to the number twelve that year. When we played the Freshmen 12 too favor ' 95 was written across the score card. Not long after this we played the Sophomores to the tune of 12 to o, also ; and since we could not arrange a game with the seniors we closed the year with the honor of being the only class against which no team had scored a point. Athletic day, in the spring of ' 94, was as honorably gone through with as the football season had been. Although his opponents had magic slippers and winged feet, our indomitable Cicero won the cham- pionship for ' 95 by winning the highest number of events. Ninety-five did not confine her efforts to athletics during this year, however, as her success would seem to indicate. She placed on the boards a minstrel troupe that surprised and delighted every audience before which they showed. The actors were Mattie and Goat, end men, Cromo, manager, and Henry, Soul, Fox, Frank, W. W. (alias Lightning-rod) and Ham, sub-stars. This entertainment, given the Fri- day night before Maxwell Chambers Day, was one of the many new departures which have been made by the class of ' 95, and with which the world is already so familiar. This, our junior year, though, with all its successes and victories, is darkened by a cloud that almost hides the brightness of the otherwise happy session. When we returned from the Christmas holidays, happy, light-hearted and careless, each student was chilled by the unusual quiet and surprised by seeing so many sad faces. With tearful eye and kindly accent each whispered to his neighbor, ' ' Goetchius is dead. ' ' He had been at college only four months, having entered a Junior, and in that time had won respect from every mind and carved his name in the innermost recesses of every heart. A rose had been dropped into our midst and crushed, leaving a sweetness in the air that still pervades it. Its leaves we laid carefully away in a sacred spot, and engraved on his tombstone, the heart of each true son of ' 95, an epitaph in three short words, We loved him. The grass grew over his grave, the wounds in our hearts healed over ; but a mound is left in the little graveyard and a scar where our heart-strings were wounded. The Junior year is over, and now we reach the last step of our evolution. We entered the college world a mass ofunknown substance, surrounded by mouths whose duty it was to tell all history, past, present and future, and to explain away all sciences. By slow development we separated into individuals, and per saltum we reached the state called sophos-moros. 25