Daniel McIntyre Collegiate Institute - Breezes Yearbook (Winnipeg, Manitoba Canada)

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K.—I always make a point of saying just what I think. C.—Good. Then we’ll have a nice quiet evening. Ed.—You know, I like Pamela. She’s a girl who stands out in a crowd. Bert—H’m! I prefer one who sits out. Author—I ought to have been a chemist. Wife—A chemist? Why, dear? Author—Everything I write becomes a drug on the market ' . A DUMBELL’S IDEA OF A TRACK TEAM The absent-minded professor who put out the clock and wound up the cat is reported to have forgotten his watch and then taken it out to see if he had time to go back for it. Wealthy Aunt—Now, remember, Hugh, you are to be one of my executors. Nervous Nephew—Er—certainly, aunt; any time you like. 24

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ROOM 61, “THE GRINDERS” Chips from the Grindstone Pickle’s poetic tendencies are developing. We are, in fact, hoping to see him some day shine forth as poet floreate of Canada. A Perhaps Poem Within Room 61, they say, The pupils study night and day; So, in the June exams, you bet They all will 1A honors get. P.S.—Write a note on the versification???-Oh, rats! Why does Gervas get angry when Miss Doupe says, “Now, Gervas, you put your sentence at the top of the blackboard.” Poor little Gervas. We wonder what would happen if someone commended us on being the best behaved class in the school ? Bring on the stretcher bearers! Does Linnie wear glasses to look wise? If such be the case, Herby, Laura and our other class “savants” must look to their laurels. “SLICKERS” No doubt the teachers will soon become infected with this fever which has seized the “schoolboy with shining morning” slicker. Then we shall see Mr. Murphy strolling up Alverstone Street, the letters on his back proclaiming “arma virumque cano,” or “Quisque pro se.” Mr. Cooke’s coat will say “Alone, alone, all alone,” and “Oh! oh! oh! oh!” that very dramatic passage from “Macbeth.” And also Miss Clark with “je suis, tu es, il est,” etc., and Miss Moore with “The steps leading up to Confederation are—” This cartoon speaks for itself. Can you guess whom it represents? Neither can we.— C. C. “How long you in jail fo’, Mose? “Two weeks.” “What am de cha’ge?” “No cha’ge, everything am free.” “Ah mean, what has you did?” “Done shot my wife.” “You all killed your wife and only in jail fo’ two weeks?” “Dat’s all—den I gets hung.” 23

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Casey and Riley agreed to settle their disputes by a fight, and it was understood that whoever wanted to stop the fight should say, “Enough.” Casey had Riley down and was hammering him unmercifully paying no heed to Riley’s frantic cries of “Enough.” “Say, why don’t you let him up? Can’t you hear him say ‘Enough?” cried a bystander. “Sure,” replied Casey, “but he’s such a liar you can’t believe him.” He—Are you fond of Kipling? She—I really don’t know. How do you kipple? One day a man, while walking along a country road, stopped to lean against a fence and talk with a boy working in a cornfield. “Say, that corn looks kind of green, doesn’t it?” he said. “Yep, that’s the kind we planted.” “It doesn’t look as if you will get more than half the crop,” said the man. “Don’t expect to. The landlord gets the other half.” After a long pause the man said: “Say, boy, is there much difference between you and a fool?” “Nope, only the fence.” WRONG NUMBER Senior (coolly, to a Primary who has just picked up her handkerchief) —Thank you! But if I should happen to drop it again, please don’t bother!! It wasn’t meant for you!!! 25