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Page 54 text:
4 2151 111 EIIIEI 1251211112111
uf t 2 Qll2155 nf 45
WE the Senlor Cla of 1946 composed of various and
sundry characters and mmdful and nearly certaln that
we wlll shortlv graduate do hereby make publlsh and
declare thls as our Last Wlll and Testament
FIRST We dlrect that all our debts fand we probably
have many of them both octal and moral? be pald to
whosoever deslres them as soon as possible after these
SECOND All the rest remalnder and especlally rest
due of our debts possesslons and obhgatlons we glve
allocate be tow and devl e upon our many land perhaps
favored! hetrs the faculty to wrt and whereas
I To MR JAMES JOSEPH REYNOLDS beloved and
dlstmgulshed Dean of the Senxors mathemattcs teacher
extraordlnary and resident of Tarrytown on the Hudson
lnear Wmgdale the local Chockful 0 Nuts! we do hereby
bequeath one barrel of the finest lubrtcatmg oll to faclhtate
hrs Sllpplllg of stx fives econd a book of tickets to the
ulz KldS pro ram so that he can always play school
third one Loulsvllle Slu ger bat so that he may finally
become a blgleaguer fourth a copy of Dantes Inferno
with butlt ln chlme so he can play Hell Bell and la t
one slide rule so that he may always be able to know the
II To one who always awaits us with batted breath
tortan SOCl0I0gl t and life lon member of the bar we do
bestow a box of feather so that he may have three ln
hand and one In h cork crew o that he always will have
an open and hut ca e
III To that able and e peclally strlkm French teacher
MONSIEUR ,ll LES HILLEIN we do lease two books
namely one copy of Rlpleys Belzete It Or Not trans
lated into the French o that he may always tate with
aut orlty D wat eet boy' and one copy of
Charles Darwm s Orzgzn o the Speczes also translated into
the French o that he may forever know just who ns a
IN To the flrt Engll h ettler of Columbia Grammar
School Dean of the ,luntor and En ll h Spanish and
Latm teacher namely NIR EDW-XRD J 'NIORI-XRTY we
bequeath a reclalmed radar et o that he mav forever
be able to locate hrs errant but otherwise playful ,Iumors
second two txckets to that famous lDSlllllll0I'l the ,lumor
Irom o that he may brmg an escort and fmally one
pelhng book so that he may be certam that everyone
spells hrs name correctly
Y To MR WILLIAM NIGEN who IS always ln the
swam and IS thought to mhablt the Bronx we leave a
bottle containing a generous amount of mellmg salts
so that he may admlnlster and to those for whom the
shock ts too great upon seelng htm really get that bathmg
suxt wet tn the swlmmm pool
Xl To 'NIR ISADOR CORN talented plamst and chord
collector we bequeath a complete set of tuntn fork s
that he may never mject a false note into whatever he
XII To MR FREDERIC ARLINGTON ALDEN be
loved Headmaster we leave one flock of sheep so that he
may have a permanent source of sheepskms and wlll always
be able to pull the wool over our eyes and one lump
of coal o that he and the faculty may never have to
put themselves out m order to gtve us a fuel holiday
XIII To MISS MARY T ALDEN our fmanclal genius
we leave a bottle of black xnk o that he may success
fully get the school out of the red and one subway turn
sttle so that she can gtve the students who pester her the
IX To MR RUBEN SIMON teacher of mathematics
and ardent sports fan we leave one set of Index cards
upon which he may tabulate the countle s number of sults
that he po e se
X To that enterprx mg busme manager and toupee
collector MR HENRY GOLDBERC, we bequeath one
box of clgars of the brand that he constantly smoke W
dnrect that these cn ar he made to explode o that he
aforesatd 'SIR C-OLDBERG will get a real bang out of
XI To NIISS LECLARE CLEWIONS our llbrarlan we
bequeath a box containing a liberal quantttv of fre ll
worm We dlrect that the e worm he placed one each
ln the many yolume that are tn the llbrary ln the hope
that the aforesaid 'SIISS CLENIONS will Hnally hate all
the bookworm he de Ire
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Page 53 text:
1115 b ay-
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' 1 GROSQMAN
MOST 1.114150 SUBJECT
LEAST LIKED SUBJECT
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G ONE7' KHYGE
FAVORITE ACTOR DON
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KATHARINE HEPBURN ,
MOVUE OF THEYEAPN '1 V VW '
THE LOST WEESND O ' UKELY
ST PX E R A """'O '
BE k'vlikMLEo'i'THE A 5 SUECEEED
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DAVE STRAUSS MORT LOM ASK
Page 55 text:
XII To DOCTOR KARL LLRICII German teacher
we bequeath a box contammg a et of the finet ear
plu s obtatnable We hope that the Doctor wlll msert
these ln hrs ears when he feels compelled to state Ach
such a not el
XIII To NIR HARRY NI REDER our athletic d
rector chref firstatder and hygtene mstructor we be
queath one clmtcal thermometer so that he may always
be mformed as to the degree of our fevertsh anxiety t
attend hrs hyglene class and one honorary certificate of
veterinary medlcme from a nearby Barbers College so
that he wrll not have to spltt haxrs wlth hrs students
XIV To MESSR5 NICHOLAS 'VIORANTE CHARLES
BATTERMAN and BERNARD CHERIN physxcal educa
tion Instructors we leave a complete leather bound book
contamtng the rules for every sport known to man dlrect
mg that they share thls book wlth MR JAMES JOSEPH
REYNOLDS so that they may forever play the game
XV To the relgnmg anttque of Columbta Grammar
School DOCTOR DOW B BEENE profe sor of Latm Eng
lrsh and mathematics we leave a small wooden box
of cubrcal shape each edge of whrch shall be as long as a
P1608 of rope We dlrect that the good doctor place rn
this box the duck mrlk of whtch he IS so fond
XVI To MR IRVING H RANDEL biology chemlstry
and physics teacher we do bequeath one cop of Mathe
mrmcs for the Millions so that he may prove to hrs
future classes that any problem he glves them are merely
mental arlthmetlc second a generous supply of nnrates
contamm a liberal quanttty of Old Colds o that the
aforesard MR RANDEL may never become trrltated and
finally a season pass to the nt ht club known as the Vtlla e
Barn so that he may ascertain which of his students llve
rn a barn
XVII To NIISS FLORENCE 'NI LEONARD head of
the Leonard School we leave one knlfe and fork o that
Instead of benefltln from our terlmg qualttles she can
benefit from sterlm srlver
XVIII To MR HIGH M 'NIERSON Director f
Cutdance we leave next year enlor cla for whatever
ood tt mav do htm It ts our earne t hope that the afore
sald Nfr Us-rson refuses to allow the Cla of 9-It
to remaln ln chool not later than that year Second
we bequeath htm three dtvots to replace tho e lo t rn lat
weeks olf tournament and four trln t ht vtolm No
fatr squealm I
XIX blot to three oldrers not to two saxlor but to
Juan Nlarm Spanish teacher we leave not a cool today
but a hot tamale
XX To NIR GEORGE ALBERT FIELD Englrsh
teacher French teacher htstonan phrlosophy student
authorlty on current events and a man whom we shall
always have to look up to we bequeath a palr of field
glasses so he may always know who hrs peers are
second one room at the Z whlch rs right behmd the Y
and thlrd a ticket to the National Barn Dance so he mav
never have to go around ln ctrcles but tn squares
XXI To MR SOL NIISHKIN basketball coach and
history teacher we leave a set of blackout curtams
that he may never be caught m another halr rand and a
brand new car so that he may always Drlve drlve dnve'
XXII To DR HENRY WILLEN we leave a full fash
toned set of Spanlsh verbs ser and estar so that he wrll
know whether he IS to be or not to be or not
XXIII To MR LEON SHERKER Russlan woodwork
authortty we leave a box of necktres a book on the
use of same and a loudspeaker and a soapbox so that he
may orgamze a teachers unton
XXIV To the LEONARD SCHOOL for GIRLS we
bequeath complete and full tuttton to the DuBarry Success
Course so that each of them may become as DuBarry was
a lady and also complete and full tultton to the Studios
o Arthur Murray who wtll teach them rn a hurry how
to dance to the muslc m the cafeteria
XXX To MR NORNIAN BELLIN the man behmd
the Glee Club ptano we bequeath a pitch ptpe so that he
may always keep m tune with the rest of the world
XXVI To MR ALVARO SANCHEL hlstorv teacher
and Dean we bequeath one copy of Taxulermy Made Easy
o he may know what to do wrth a student s tatl whnch IS
not tn a eat during tudy hall
BEING OF sound mtncl and bodv fa question open to
debate! we have affixed our seal rn witness thereof declar
thrs to be our Last Wrll and Te tament on the
twenty nmth day of Xlav ln the year of our Lord nme
teen hundred and fortv
Before me a Nuttary Public for no ood rea on per
onally appeared the above signed who havtn been duly
svsom at by me fooll hly stated that they had vvrltten the
above to the best of thelr ablltty and knovvled e fwhxch ts
eemmgly not much! an untrue and ht hly slanderous
account of the per onalttles of the faculty of Columbia
Swom at on the 29th day of 'flat I9-I6 and counter
felted bv I A Anonymous Auttarv Pllb1lClX0 6
Belletue Hospztal Hly comml lon exprre when
Ido The CIMA of I946
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