Clay City High School - Claytonian Yearbook (Clay City, IL)

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19 C I Cl IJ Ionian '• • • • •• • • • 52 Senior Class Prophecy As we gaze into the crystal ball, the future of each member of the class of ’52 is revealed. Professor C. R. Baker, M.A.D., has developed a revolutionary theory on why cocoa is not derived from coconuts. Ruth Bateman departed for Borneo, an island largely populated by cannibals, on a missionary journey two years ago. It is reported that the cannibals are all healthy. We shall miss her! Erma Bayler is official taster for the million dollar Clay City Bakery! She now weighs 299 pounds and 10 ounces. George Bissey, circus barker for the Barn and Bail Circus, has created with his convincing spiel, an ever increasing demand for two-headed men. Bob Boxell, zoo keeper, is trying to teach the monkeys the fundamentals of civilization. The monkeys have learned to shake hands, and Bob is also progressing rapidly. He is now one of our most enthusiastic tree climbers and has developed a passion for bananas. Claude Dasch has manufactured a new type of footstool, which closely resembles a radiator, for installation in all of the best schools. Merlin Dasch has departed to live a hermit’s life in an unexplored region of Africa, because he lost his little black book. Bobby Daubs, the mathematical genius, has acquired the position of public accountant at the R. U. Rite Company. Marilyn Erwin was the private secretary at Cockerel’s Police Station until last week. At that time she eloped with the son of the Chief of Police. Catherine Gibbs and Carolyn Mayo have teamed up. Catherine writes the songs and Carolyn plugs them on her coast-to-coast disc jockey program. Catherine’s latest — “Because Of You, I Missed The Shrimp Boat, So We’ll Have Hamburgers Tonight.” Jim Gill, a graduate of an agricultural college, has been chosen as the one most likely to sack seed. Norma Gill, the first woman President of the United States, has passed a bill which rules that there will be no more than five government women to do one woman’s job. Mary Ruth Henderson is partially responsible for Norma’s election, for she is her campaign manager. In one of Norma’s speeches, which was prepared by Mary Ruth, the promise was made that the federal government would build an arena for bull fights in Clay City. (Continued)

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tan 52 Class Will Jim Kuenstler leaves his active membership in F.F.A. to the new members of next year. Melvin Lee wills his museum piece and principal means of transportation, to be sold as junk. The proceeds are to be given to the 1953 Senior Class Treasury, for assurance of a 1953 Annual. Jeannine McGrew leaves her ability to distinguish between acid and water, as a reminder to Mr. Bissey that a trustful nature is not always an asset. Colene McVay leaves her friendliness to be distributed among everyone in school, to make it a happier place. Carolyn Mayo bequeaths her pert little earrings to Sue Schofield. Bob Monical leaves a warning to all students to beware of classmates whose generous help may induce the teachers to dispense with their presence. Marie Mosser bestows her familiar hair ribbons and barrettes upon Minerva Phillips. Don O’Dell wills his nickname to anyone who will have it, for he certainly doesn’t want to take it with him. Doris Patridge leaves her many hair-dos to any aspiring, young beautician, who wishes to specialize in hair-dressing. Lola Ruth Patridge leaves that temperamental typewriter to Mr. Cohoon, hoping he will either repair it or throw it away. Keith Pickens — fulfilling a lifelong ambition — leaves. Norma Rhoads wills her well-known giggle to Delbert Johnson. Bill Sharp bequeaths his cute little-boyish grin to Gaylord Weidner. Fred Shelton bestows his height upon Arkie Smith. Carole Shore leaves her “sunny” disposition in the morning to Carolyn Coggan. Barbara Springer wills her incessant chatter to Marilyn Hostettler. Wayne Stanley leaves his banjo playing to Shorty, as he is already teaching him how. Jim Stowers bequeaths his northern drawl to Bud Graves. Loren Sunday leaves his harassing position as co-editor of the Annual to anyone who thinks they can withstand the strain. Kaye Taylor leaves her dancing ability to the Sophomore and Junior boys, so that the Prom of ’53 will be very successful. Fern Walker leaves her 5. average to Sue Noble. George Weber confers his blush upon Fred Black. Don Weger leaves his sports ability to Raymond Hinterscher. Don Williams bequeaths his wisecracks to John Brooks. We, Barbara Springer and Carole Shore, do hereby affix our seal of approval upon this disreputable document on this fourteenth day of March, in the year of our Lord, one thousand nine hundred and fifty-two. Carole Shore Barbara Springer

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19 + + ++++4 ClIon ian 52 Senior Class Prophecy Julia Hilderbrand has received our city’s award for the most careful taxi driver. She has set a safety record, for she has damaged only fenders — 321 of them. Bill Holcomb, having joined the Foreign Legion at an early age, is now living in India, with a harem of thirty wives. Kenneth Hostettler has a huge ranch in Texas. With the unbeatable combination of beef cattle and oil, Kenneth has bought a half interest in the U. S. Treasury. The other half is owned by Harry Truman, who has donated most of it to foreign countries and to his vacations in Florida. Joan Kessler has completed her nurse’s training and is now qualified to care for disabled dodoes. Jim Knowles sailed for the South Sea Islands and has not been heard of since. Jim Kuenstler, philanthropist, gathered his fortune by selling shoe laces. His latest charity is a home for old-aged grasshoppers. Fred Kuenstler is industriously digging in the sands of Egvpt. He is an archaeologist of very little fame, but we have confidence that'he will find his mummy. Melvin Lee, a renowned inventor, has recently created a window pane with only one side because it will save washing time. Jeannine McGrew, her artistic talent unrecognized by the world has resorted to painting stripes on barber poles. Colene McVay is now employed by radio station D.D.T. to sing commercials about Great Cousin Edward’s Soap, which contains the new miracle ingredient, petroleum. Bob Monical, U. S. ambassador, has assured us of peace Texas has become our ally. Marie Mosser and her husband, Keith Pickens, are living peacefully in Ingraham, the third largest city in the nation, where Keith is Mayor. Don O’Dell in now a southern planter. He has taken his cue from the famous radio program and has become an undertaker in Atlanta Georgia. Doris Patndge and Kaye Taylor have married twin brothers who are both multimillionaires. They are living in Florida, where the President and Margaret are their weekly Sunday dinner guests Lola Ruth Patridge writes a column in a Chicago newspaper which is devoted to her magic recipes. She is the author of our favorite ’ recioe Pickled Strawberries with Glue Salad. F ' (Continued)