Billerica Memorial High School - BMHS Yearbook (Billerica, MA)

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JUNIOR CLASS

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HOWE HIGH SCHOOL HUMOR He: “Do you dance?” She: “Oh I love to (too). He: “Well let’s do that instead.” Miss Osgood: “Tolutis, parse this sent- ence: ‘John married Jane.’ ” Tolutis: “ ‘John’ is a noun because it’s the name of something; ‘married’ js a con- junction because it joins ‘John’ and ‘Jane’; ‘Jane’ is a verb because she governs ‘John’.” ok Waiter: “What is your order, sir?” Forrest Blair: “A demi-tasse please.” Waiter: “And yours?” David Noonan: “The same as his with a cup of coffee.” K K Waitress in ice cream parlor: ‘Did you order this sundae, sir?’ Absent-minded Parker: “Goodness! Have I been here that long?” OR x “T’m no good unless I strike,” declared the match. “Yes, and every time you strike you lose your head,” complained the matchbox. E ae Neighbor: “They tell me your son is on the high school eleven.” Mrs. Finnagan proudly: “Yes, indeed!” Neighbor: “Do you know what posi- tion he plays?” Mrs. Finnagan: “I’m not sure, but I think he’s one of the drawbacks.” Kk Teacher: “If they speak Spanish in Spain, what do they speak in Alaska?” Snyder: “Elastic.” k Miss Osgood: “What did write?” i Chet Sandberg: “ ‘The Oddity’ and ‘The Idiot’.” Homer Miss Baker: “Were you late this morning ?” Edith Colgate: “No, the bell didn’t wait for me.” ee Mr. Adams: “Why do you persist in saying that lightning will never strike the front of a street car.” Bent: “Because the motorman is a non-conductor.” Sr Demonstrator (in factory): “This ma- chine can take the place of forty girls.” Youthful Worker: “Yeh, but who wants a date with a machine?” x ok Two halves make a whole and the full- back goes through. 26 Teacher (to little sophomore who is reading in class): “You didn’t express that mark at the end of the sentence! Try again!” Sophomore: “Oh! Why are you sad, little buttonhook ?” Miss Osgood: ‘“You’ve looked at his paper three times.” Bent: ‘Yes, ma’am. He’s a freshman an’ he don’t write very plain!” xk : Blanche Bocko: “Caesar must have been awfully strong.” Mrs. Sampson: “Why?” Blanche Bocko: “it says here: ‘Caesar pitched his camp across the river’.” School is a place That everyone fears, And isn’t it funny We go there for years. kK Miss Baker: “What is the meaning of ‘Domine’ ?” Pupil (distractedly): “Oh Lord!” Miss Baker: “Correct.” k John Ross: “Did you kill any moths with those moth-balls I gave you?” Gullage: ‘No, I tried for five hours, but I couldn’t hit one.” So Woollard: “Teacher told us to have the description of a caterpillar ready for tomorrow. Does anybody know the de- scription ?” Howarth: “Why, just tell her that it is an upholstered worm x Ox ” Miss Collier: “Field, wnat insect lives on the least food?” Field: “The moth. It eats holes.” ok Irate traffic officer (to Phil Scott who was driving along at 70): “Do you know how fast you’re driving?” Phil (lasping into customary answer given in English class): “It just slipped my mind.” Ss k We editors may dig and think Until our finger tips are sore; But somebody is sure to say, “Aw, I heard that joke before.” ae or 3 DORIS QUINN, Chairman MARY GRANFIELD DAVID NOONAN

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