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Page 149 text:
FITZGERALD BOTTLING COMPANY
FOR OUTSTANDING FOOD
VALUES, LOW PRICES
ALTON'S FAMILY THEATRES EVERY DAY! AND A GREAT
SELECTION OF FINE FOODS,
W SHOP AT THE NEW A at P
AND SUPER MARKET
AT 401 PIASA.
"HOME or ALL BIG PICTURES"
A 81 P
Page 148 text:
Miss Klump: "When I was your age I could
answer any question in algebra."
Howard Cochrane: "Yes, but you had a differ'
Greg Wagner: "Do you know why I'm like a
Miss Paul: "Noi But I've always wanted to
Miss Gates: L'What is geometry?"
Dick Fischer: "The little acorn grew and grew
and one day it woke up and said, 'Gefomfetry'
Mr. Stallings discussing his son and heir, whom
he had recently taken into the profession:
"Well, yes, he's shaping pretty well, but he
has a long way to go before he'll have a head big
enough to fill my shoes."
Bill Godwin: "Say pal, will you loan me a nickel?
I want to call a friend."
Carl Clark: "Here's 15c, call all your friends."
Bookstore clerk: "This book will do half your
work for you."
Dick Fischer: 'LGreat, I'll take two!"
Heard in the halls at Alton High School.
"Who yuh shoven
'LDunnog what's your name?"
Max Thompson Cto young daughter sucking her
thumblz "Hey, kid, don't bite that thumb off.
You may need it when you get old enough to
A County Coroner in Illinois was telling the
story of a death certificate which reached him
recently. In the column reserved for "cause of the
death" the doctor had signed his own name.
The coroner returned the certificate with a note
which said: "This may be true, but don't you
think we had better have some scientific reason
Mary Muller:"Whenever I'm down in the
clumps, I buy myself a new hat."
Gordon: "Oh, so that's where you get them."
Auto Salesman: "Have you a garage?"
Mr. Myers: "I don't know, my daughter just
went down to get the car out of it."
I SERVICE +
2700 Brown St. Phone 993
WELLS TIRE CII., INC.
833 E. Broadway Alton, 111-
Page 150 text:
In English class-
Miss Lowry: "Conjugate the verb "to swim."
Helen W.: uSwim, swam, swumf'
Miss Lowry: 'Conjugate the verb Hto dim."
Helen W.: "Say, you aren't trying to kid me,
Miss Rutledge: "The examination papers are
now in the hands of the typist. Are there any
last minute questions?"
Elvis Lamm: "Who's the typist?"
Mr. Freeman: HGot a minute to spare, Dan?"
Mr. Freeman: "Then tell me all you know."
A STORYeTRUE OR FICTION
Not long ago Bob Young saw a sign on an Upper
Alton restaurant window "All you can eat for 35c"
and being very hungry Young went in. After
consuming 3 regular dinners and being refused a
fourth serving Bob appealed to the cashier. A
large man himselffthe cashierflistened to Bob's
plea and carefully checked Bob's massive frame
and then replied, "Young man, our offer still
stands good but we didn't agree to fill silos."
BOOKS "ER" BOOKS
Miss Colonius: Cln a book storej "Has this
book a love interest?"
Book Dealer: "Yes, a thrilling one."
Miss Colonius: "Humor?"
Book Dealer: "Yes, rib splitting."
Miss Colonius: "Murder? Action? Mystery?
Book Dealer: Here, you want a dictionary."
Don Halford met a new queen at a party in
Hartford. Don said, "If you will give me your
telephone number I'l1 call you up some time."
"It's in the book," said the girl.
Don: "Fine, And what's your name?"
The girl: "Thats in the book, too!"
And 'tis said Don has tried 687 Wood River
calls-all to no avail.
It is said that women of Rio de Janeiro do not
like orchids but orchids cost only a dime a dozen
there. Now if the point isn't clear you don't
know women! l !
When one of Pauline Carroll's boy friends asked
if he could kiss her little sister, she told him to
pick on some one his own size.
ge: It ,az
I i I f 7 Y . jp'
AM W 6 D
I I, '
7 TH YO Dnv c-ooos .CO p ,..,--
104 W. Third Alton, 111.
"At Your Service"
BOB'S BAND BOX
'I 9 3 I
ODORLESS DRY CLEANING
207 E. Broadway Alton
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