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Page 43 text:
LUCIEN HOLMAN has become Harlem s Fats Waller He IS known as Harlem s Mass
a Muscle Hole man Get at?
BETTY HOWARD 15 ra1s1ng asparagus for Hemz C583 Baby food
KENNETH HOPKINS 15 workmg qu1lt block des1gns for a natlonal needle work magazme
DAVID HORN knockan em dead wlth h1s ampersonatxon of Jammy Durante
HUGH HORSTMAN 15 the famous Huey the peanut vendor 1nc1dentally he sells
Ponta acs on the s1de
AGNES HUCK as belng awarded a copy of the new book Tlus Vegetable World for ralslng
the bxggest beet 1n Godfrey townshlp
MARJORIE HUFF croon1ng a lullaby to Tarzan Jr 1n the top of a poplar tree
DOUGLAS HUISH has scaled the pOllt1C3l he1ghts to become Cheese of Polace of Dogtown
HELEN HUNTER pav1ng the streets of Par1s
DAVID JACOBY 15 a hlghly respected tonsorlal art1st Ca hemj
A neon Slgn amad many at reads OSCAR JAEGER S school for Jxtterbugs and z.an1es
all padded cells reserved
JAMES JOHNESEE IS pa1nt1ng murals for the local Veterans of Future Wars bualdmg
and are they cute'
BERNICE JONES IS the head ofa mul order house that SPCCIIIIRS in false teeth
DOLORES JONES fOW1Dg her own boat across the Engl1sh Channel
TOMMY JONES looklng at the scrapbook of h1s h1gh school career Them was the days
EVELYN JOUETT has anstalled publ1c finger bowls along Altons busmess dastract for
passers by She was awarded a medal for bemg a publ1c benefactor by the Amerlc an Leglon
HERMAN JUNGK as the notor1ous publlsher of Lat1n ponxes for second year Caesarltes
EVELYN KINGERY has establlshed a beauty parlor 1n Yellowstone Park for the bears
DELMAR KIRCHHOFF buy1ng a thousand sweepstakes tackets
EVELYN KRUSE do1ng a d1fI1cult dance routxne wath Fred Asta1re ID h1s old age
ROBERT LAHLEIN model1ng red flannels an a full page full color spread 1n the latest
MARGARET LASLIE w1nn1ng a ple eatmg contest at the Jersey County fa1r
MILFRED LAU the great k1dda1r 1n a spasm He IS laugh1ng hamself to death at one
of has own jokes
DORIS LAUX as a professlonal mourner on the pay roll of Streeper s Funeral Home
EUGENE LAUX as composlng addltaonal verses to Mznnze the Moocher
NORMA LENHARDT beang crowned ueen of the May atop the Emp1re State Bu1ld1n
MARTHA LOGAN has anvented a new golf club that can be converted 1nto a plow af
necessary thus a1d1ng farmers greatly
CHARLOTTE MCCURDY the perennaal debutante IS about to drop three peas off her
peuter plated kmfe at a famous soc1ety d1nner now an progress
BETTY MCDOW 15 the mgenue of the Golden Rod Show Boat She recently made a sup
er collosal stupendous success an the famous play No Mothef to Guade Her
BETTY McKEE has dlscovered Edna Wallace Hoppers secret of prolonged youth
ESTHER McKEE has settled down on her thousand acre parrot reserve
HARRY MCINTOSH IS a mus1cal vartuoso and 15 seekmg 1nsp1rat1on to wrate a composltxon
to be called The Tunes Drrge
OPAL MCPHERSON IS the notoraous mystery aboard the S S ueen Fann1e Sh sh sh sh sh'
DONALD MAREING lishmg for a mermaxd off the Florada coast
LUCY MARSHALL IS at last buryxng the old apple tree
DON MEISENHEIMER as a home spun phllosopher telllng about has days down an O alton
Illmolse He s got the country IH convulslons
ERNEST MEYERS takang lessons from a noted expert fHomer ClarkJ on how to evade a
cop and how to talk h1m out of a t1cket 1f the evasaon faaled
LOUIS MILLER 15 a l1v1ng person1f1cat1on of R1p Van W1nkle He went to sleep 1m
med1ately after graduataon and st1ll rests an peace
VINCENT MONZEL has never come out of h1d1ng sxnce the 1938 Tatler was publlshgd
Un the w1lds of Machlganl
KENNETH MOORE selhng art15c1al finger naals and eye lashes to the football heroes
RUTH MOORE coachlng her llttle ones to follow 1n thelr fathers footsteps
RICHARD MUSGRAVE takmg up EIHSUCIHS theory where E1nste1n left off
MARY MARTIN 15 an msurance collector for her husband s clrents That personal touch
JAMES NORVELL 15 the grandstand hero of the Maln street pm ball team
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Page 42 text:
JANE DIXON peddlang nosegays to the vasators of the Alton Dam saght
JUNE DONAHUE as manufacturang confetti for New Years Exe celebrataons
MAXINE DOWNS sax ang string for the want of anythang else to do
RICHARD DRESCHER as the father of the famous Drescher twins who haxe toured Europe
astounding audaences with thear paano duets The talent comes from thear mother s sade
BLANCHE EALEY throwang peanuts to her traaned anteaters whale saalang through the
aar on her flyang trapeze
ANNETTE EATON they finally got rad of Kate Smath and now thas lattle gal as goan places
KATHRYN ELWELL sangan the tatle role an Grandpa Meets Grarmv at Muray Opera
CLARENCE EMMONS as the great Mogul of Cottage Halls
PAULINE ERBE as flag wavang for the D A R
RUTH EVANS tapping away on a typewrater to the tune of her saxth True Confessaon
RAY FANSLER as a married man Yappee' '
BILL FANSLER as Charlae McCarthy s stand an an has latest Goldwyn extravaganza The
LAVERNE FESSLER lavang the lafe of a monkfeyl an the walds of Elsah
LAWRENCE FIELDS carvang has anataals on a publac bualdang Tch' Tch'
DOUGLAS FISK peddlang bacycles from door to door for Angell Ear Fask Inc
LAVERNE FREEMAN has anaugurated auto gyro servace from Alton to Grafton and
back agaan for a lattle less than ten cents per round trap the dafference amounts to Mr
Horner s davy
GEORGE GHENT was recently appoanted dog catcher for the caty of Fosterburg
CHARLES GIBSON has won a cup from Barnum E? Baaley carcus for sellang jo jo the Dog
faced Boy to the publac
MARY GILDERSLEEVE as a crackfedj saleslady an Moskans haberdashery
DARWIN GILL as re wratang Websters dactaonary on has own terms
MARY GISSLER as sponsoring an extra curricular class at A H S for young garls How
to Effectavely Nag Unapprecaatave Husbands
ELLEN GOULD an Reno lanked wath rumors of the fifth divorce suat of Baby Le Roy The
Robert Taylor of 1950
CLIFFORD GRAHAM has hatch haked to Moscow to play fiddle for the Great Bazaar
CARROLL GREER has become a bug fiend and now runs a chaan of food supply stores for
WALTER GREGORY has opened a booth at Youngs department store for the sale of
flavored lead pencals for chewang another woe to the Old Guard school teacher
MARJORIE GRISSOM as a traan stewardess badang her tame some where between New
York and Los Angeles
MARGARET HANNA has cast asade famaly tradataon and has become Hollywood s chaef
exponent of the glamour garl She has daed her haar and as revered as the emancapator of
the dash water blonde
BETTY HARFORD has opened a boarding house for kicked out debutantes
GILBERT HARTMAN as stall tryang to beat Barney Oldfield s record on has new one
wheeled gravaty defyang una cycle
AGNES HAYES as runnang a hotel at the North Pole for the benefit of women who vant
to be alone
CATHERINE HAYES as readang reports from the Nataon al Stock Yards over radao stataon
S T Y N K Nameoka
GEORGE HAYS as sellang an oragan al brand of Dark for photographer s dark rooms
VERNA HEEREN as marooned on Mt Everest the only woman to exer reach the top
HAZEL HENDERSON has starred up the local Manastera al Allaance wath her swang versaon
of Onward Chrastaan Soldaers
MILDRED HENDERSON was reported lost Whale Bualdang Castles In Spaan ats stall
EANNE HERZLER as a professaonal cynac spreading her lattle rays of sunshane
HERBERT HICKMAN was xoted Publac Heart breaktr No 1 by the Unated States
Department of justice
PAULINE HIGGINS as a tight rope walker
EDWARD HOFFMAN has become Altons most prolafac Wampy
GLORIA HOLLAND as swangan down lafe s haghway as a bcspectacled laborate soap box
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Page 44 text:
FRED OLSEN CO111111Uf1I1g duly hetvseen the South Polevxhere he d1t th XZ7 Sc S4 4
1tr111l1t1on Pengum DouhleT1lk Weekly J 1nd New York vxhere h 1 xxork1n 1 1
th ory of perpetu1l e111ot1on
ALICE ONITIS h1 vxntten the gre1t A111er1e1n ep1c Who K1II d Cock Rohn?
MARVIN OVERBY old 1nd gro keep1nU t1111e on th three 111d OIT e1u1rt r p opl t ll
xxork1ng o11 the N Y A 1t Alton H1gh
ROBERT PARSH 1 pre d nt of the Thlrd IN1t1on1l B111k It Moro
DWIGHT PITKIIN 11ter u mg Kre111el h11r LOHIC 1 111dor 1111, the1r 1d of the hetore 111d
1fter X IFIECY
BILL PITTS IS O c1r I1eger s ch1ef utter hug ID h1s New York 1lo11 P1tt d1et con
of twelxe hnelx chopped Benny Good1111n record 111d 1 dru111 t1ek 11,1 1t1n
JUNE POLLARD lb 1n u herette It the Gr1nd
HARRY RETZER 1 1n expert n1u hroo111 f1nc1er spec11l1 ID 111 the Altu111h Br111d
ALBERTA RITCHEY 19 tourmg the country vuth her 11111 1111, CUIILLUOII of u ed toothp1ek
LILLIAN ROBINSON t1ll l111g1n hunhurgers It MCll1I1g,S
WILMA ROBINSON h1s heen w11t1ng QIDCC 19718 hut 1t won t he Long novx' '
VIRGINIA ROSS 1 lI1 O 11k H1ll helle pu I1111, oxer FIITIIIL Hur t l1test nox l hetvs en
IOSFPHINE RUSSEL 1 1 h 1nk n1ght hend
BOB RUTZ 1 te1ch1ng Econo1111cs to IoI1 Cord r
ALVANETTE SAMPSON 15 the or1g1n1tor of the fnnou AIITIILIWLLI Soup
CLAUDINE PHIPPS IS he 1d nurse of the loc 1l dog hosp1t1I
VIRGINIA SANDERBON 15 pl1y1ng t1111hor1nes for the S1lx 1t1o11 Army
HELEN SAPOT 15 the ch1111peen n11tch1111ker of the Alton Women s cluh
ROSEMARY SCHMITT WINS second pr1 e 1n 1 he1uty Conte t 111d 1 1w1rded S11 OO
1nc1dent1lly shes pl 1y1ng Monopoly
CLYDE SCHMOELLER M1d1111e Ze111o gnes up
ROBERT SCHNEIDER p11nt1ng 111ust1ches on h1ll l1o1rds
WILBUR RICE IS T1 mg R1ces IH Ch1n1
BILL ROSACK h1s co111pou11ded 1 thes1s on The O 1 111 mel D xelo1111e11t of the u1d
I'lg611lI'11l1 Monogr 1phus
VIRGINIA SHAW h1s 1111rr1ed 1 stmtosphere flyer
CHARLES SCHWARTZ IS 1,1ll1ntly h1l 1nc1n ten 11111 pong, l11ll h1 I1 e
GERALDINE SHIFFLETT IQ the ROCIII secret1ry to Ow Now the pr1 e or111 utme
ANDREW SIMONSEN IS the Ch1rles Atl1s of h1 d1y
ELEANOR SMITH tleelng from the smell of 1111on11 he h1s to t111d O11 1 ch11r to cry
NED SPIESS 1 111 office hoy for Henry Ford III
MARGARET STAUFFER IS gener1lly conceded hy ource 111 the know to he B11 hto11
most dex oted 1111lk 11111d
VIRGINIA STEWART g1x1ng 1 spec11l concert for the pr1 o11er of Ale1tr1 Ill w'11ch
he SH11, If I H1d the WIDE of 1n Angel
CLAIRE STONE h1 111her1ted 1 huge fortune from 111 unknove I1 c mu 111 111d 1 nom the
hfth duche of Hough Down
IEANNE STONE h1 lo t her southern drml sl1yed 1 hufI'1lo Vwlth her ow11 two h111d
111d 1111de her own hoots 1nd 1ddIe Thu he goe r1d111g,, 1l1tO the vuld of CIIIIAOYHY
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MARIORIE STOTLER 1 tru111t ofhcer for the
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RALPH STUART 1 t1ll 1tte111pt1ng, to get 1
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