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Page 155 text:
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?E glass ANU int 355112
SINGLE COPIES - 13 BYTHE YEAR 25
Page 154 text:
Editor in Chief, - - William LaMothe, A.B., CAlways Batsl.
Business Mgr., - - Leo Francis Grosh, B.S., CBaby Sisterl.
fThe following are a few sample definitions to be found in the Altonianj.
Cheat-The name applied by some few old fogies to the sensible and pro-
gressive persons who use the most new, up-to-date, scientific and safe plans for
allowing some other lazy individual to save their tired overworked brains the
danger from nervous prostration likely to be brought on by doing just that particular
Excuse-A true CFD explanation of absence, always brought from home CU.
It saves further questioning from over-inquisitive persons.
Fudge-The term applied to a heterogeneous conglomeration of unhygienic
fodder, united by unsanitary methods for the express purpose of promulgating
Girl-The only word in the Engligh language impossible of analyzation.
Experience counts for nothing unless it teaches the student to stop the course.
Many have entered the girlology course but the wisest have failed to graduate.
Even Solomon failed here, and therefore is it to be wondered at that such men as
Gaskins, McKinney, Perrin and Juttemeyer have been forced to exclaim, "The
more we learn the more we learn we donlt know? " Gill Ca Freshmanb handed
in a 500 page description of his prospective experiences. The Altonian wishes
to thank Mr. Gill. His contributions will be found on page 2313 of the 1323rd
volume of the Altonian.
Home-There is no place like home to eat onels meals. There is no place
like home to spend one's evenings Cprovided it is her homej. There is no place like
home to sleep Cprovided you have a latch keyb.
Teacher--This species Cit has not yet been decided whether they are human
or notl has probably more other names than any other. It is known as pedagogue,
crab, old man, old lady, instructor, etc., but it is usually designated either by a
special nickname peculiarly fitted to its habits or by the last name allotted to it by
nature Ca most skillful giver of fitting namesb. This species does not exactly
resemble any other species, having a much fiercer and more determined look,
probably gotten by the habit they have acquired of having their own ways. They
can usually be distinguished by spectacles, and a formidable weapon in one hand,
often a ruler. They will fight if not cornered. The best advice that can be given
in regard them is-4to avoid them whenever possible.
NOTE.-The full edition of this encyclopedia appears on pages 1323-2313 of the
TATLER. Don't miss it? Look for it.
' A 'Papa " --C. P. STEWARD.
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