Allentown Preparatory School - Alprescho Yearbook (Allentown, PA)

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G ALPREf CI-I C3 ' 1' mln H ull JDKES The world is old Yet likes to laugh New jokes are hard to find A whole new editorial staff Can't tickle every mind So if you meet some ancient joke Done up in modern guise Don't frown and call the thing a fake Iust laughg - Don't be too wisel PROF HARKINS - Who was Queen during the Elizabethan Period? FREEDMAN - Queen Anne. SCHILLER - Men of my type are not found everywhere. STOKES - Of course not-that's what they have insane asylums for. PROF. FREITAG - What's the formula for the area of a sphere? HESS - One half the base times the altitude. HU'rcH1NsoN - May I kiss you? HELEN - Say! What do you think I'm waiting for? A street car? In Biology PROF. KNAUSS - Do fish perspire? DUBELLE - Of coursel That's what makes the ocean so salty. May I have a drink? the girl friend asked. Here's a tumbler of water, quoth I. She tilted her head and angrily said, Fm not dirty you fool- l'm dry. RASKIN - Have you ever heard the Hebrew Song? TEMKO - No. What is it? RASKIN - Don't Iewish you knew. On A Spree. VOORHEES - Hicl Tom shall we Hicl gggo to the fire sale? PERRY - Lesh not. Ain't got no use for a fire. Nz' bf V9 -lin . -x X E - X X 1 S S S 1 I .f I Z One Hundred Twenty-six

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tl .ALPREfCI-16 CLAIIIDDUM ICENE SI-IEPSFY A Shut up or I ll throw you out the window. HARKINS - Oh vou will throw me out the window will you. SHEPSKY - W ho said anything about throwing you out the window. I was talk ing to XI hitne5 Schiller. HARIQINS W Be careful or I might throw vou out the window. SHE! SPY - YY hat am I supposed to do laugh? SCHILLER - It would be too bad for you Shepsky if I were the Prof. Shepsky socks W hitnev and Harkins decides not to show the boys how tough he is sitting still as a mouse.H HARKIINS - Read Grande. GRANDE -I didn't finish it all yet, Prof. HARKI'NS - Read Parnell. I PARNELL v Not quite finished with my part. X HARKINS - This class is getting as bad as my ll:-10 Spanish class, they're thick but you fellows are getting just as thick. I FROMER M Too many note hooks to keep up to date Prof. XVe don't get time to X study Spanish. HARKIiNS - Don't give me that line. YVhen I assign a lesson I want it prepared. HAGERMAN - Pardon Prof. but I'd like to leave the room again. X, HARIiINS - Yes, hut tonight try one pill instead of two or three. Shepsky what does tengo miedon mean? SHEPSKY - I am afraid, but I'm not afraid of you. f HARKINS - Dry up, I'd like to teach some Spanish this morning. N FROMER - Is Dundee going to roll the tennis court to-day? HARKINS - Ifl leave it up to Dundee the courts will never he rolled. I'll do it myself. Now don't ask any more questions. HUTCHINSON f Yvere you down at lVIealey's dance hall last night Prof? HARKINS - Yes, it was pretty good. lVIet a nice girl too. IVHITNEY SCHILLER - Was she white? HARKINS 1 Enough from you, coniugate ser , YVHITNEY - Since when can you conjugate a noun? HARKINS - You're impossible. YVHITNEY - Don't blame me, I room with Fromer. GRANDE W Alright Prof. I'm ready to read now. HARKIINS A- Soon time, go ahead. fBell rings, ending class period.D HARKIINS - Now to-morrow we must get down to work. SHEPSKY -- YVhy don't you stop that Prof? HARKINS - And Shepsky if you can't act your age don't come in and bother us to-morrow. You're excused. c A SM 7 'l -I V - li Ill. ii ' S N ' 1 x I N 1 X xl I , y I i , 'I 9 I 1 f - ' N 7 s I ' L X . 1 x ' ifgi --- s 3 X i One Hundred Twentyfve

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f ALP152.ELfcL1o I fir l l A ,Q ,, !il llsllll! JDKES PALL REVERE Qshoutxng in a window Husband home? LADX Yes PAUL Tell him the British are coming PAUL another window Husband home? LADX Yes PAUL 4 Tell him the British are coming. PAUL fstill another windowj - Husband home? LADY - No. PAUL: CDismountingj - T'hell with the British. ' X 5 -in 1 Think ihzlr over. DUKE W- Frederick it gives me great pleasure to give you a 90 for the month. FRED - Why not give me a 100 and give yourself a real thrill. SHE - If I were your wife I'd give you poison. RHODES - IfI were your husband I'd take it. POP - No I will never recognize an actress as my daughter-in-law. SON - But really she isnlt an actress. She only thinks she is. KONSCHAK - I have a suit for every day in the week. RICE - Great! Let's see them. KONSCHAK H- Here it is. 1 PERKI STUDE - Say, how come you didn't Ag? dispute Allentown Prep's claim to the H State Football Championship. BELLEFONTE DITTO - Brother - there isn't X any claim worth the beating you'd take from that team. f In L-fl 5-'1 -gfigii j J XX i .. X l One Hundred Twenty-seven X