Abbott High School - Blue and Gold Yearbook (Elgin, IL)

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SNAPS i391

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The BLUE and GOLD Old Umbrella Man: I-Iow's busi- ness ? Scissors Grinder: Fine, I've never seen things so dull. Restaurateur Kto applicant for a positionlz You say you have experi- ence? Ex-Convict: Yessir, I've been serving for the last ten years. If a horse falls into your bathtub, pull the plug out. THE INEVITABLE END Although he covets it from birth, And covets it through life's brief span, Man never, never get the earth, It is the earth that get the man. A sparrow perched on a golf-ball just as the player was about 'to drive. Birds instinctively know the safest place in a moment of danger. Cop: Hey, what are you trying to do? Man: I'm trying to pull this lamp off the bridge, My wife, wants a bridge lamp. Someone has said, There is no difficulty in this world that cannot be overcome. Wonder if he has ever tried putting toothpaste back into the tube? NOT A PATENT MEDICINE History Lecturer: Can any of you tell me what makes the Tower of Pisa lean? Corpulent Lady: I don't know or I'd take some myself. WHEW. 'fAt least once in my life I was glad to be down and out. And when was that? After my first trip in an air- plane. The pilot flew upside down most of the time. HIS ADDRESS Do you know Lincoln's Gettys- burg address? No: but in Washington it was the White House. Orlando: Yep, I built this radio set all by myself, Bill. Bill: I believe it, she whistles for every station! A man was hogging his son on his knee, when the young one bit him. The father said: What are you biting me for? The son re- plied: Who beginned this war 'I CIIATTEB Father: And there, son, I have told you the story of your daddy and the Great War. Son: Yes, daddy, but what did they need all the other soldiers or. Brown: What will you give me for my daughter's piano? Naybor: S500.00, sawed, split and delivered. A REVISED VERSION Twinkle, twinkle, little star, the nursery rhyme so familiar to everybody, has been revised by a committee of eminent scholars with the following result: Shine with irregular, intermitted light, sparkle at intervals, dimin- utive, luminous, heavenly body, How I conjecture, with surprise, not unmixed with uncertainty, what you are, Located, apparently, at such a re- mote distance from and at- a height so vastly superior to thi earth, the planet we inhibit. Similar in general appearance and refractory powers to the precious primitive octahedron crystal of pure carbon, set in the aerial re- gions surrounding the earth. REASON T0 CRY Little boy: Papa, there's an old man standing on the corner hold- ing out his basket and crying. Please give me a dime for him. Unsuspecting Dad: Here you are, son. What's he crying about? Little Boy: Balloons: Nice bal- loons, three for a dime. THEY COUl.DN'T BE WRITTEN In penmanship class one pupil had failed to have his work done for several days. The instructor told him that as a penalty he would have to write a composition of 250 words to be read in class the fol- lowing day. This is what he wrote: Last summer my uncle pur- chased a second-hand car, with which he started a trip out West. On his second day out it rained very hard and on a lonely road the car stoppedg, the other 215 words are what my uncle said trying to get that car to go. A 'lawyer, pleading the case of an infant plaintiff, took the child, suifused with tears, in his arms and presented it to the jury. This had a great effect till the opposite lawyer asked what made him cry. He pinched me, answered the little innocent. OTHERWISE ENGAGED Cohen and Macpherson were matched, and at the sixth the lat- ter drove a beautiful ball straight up the fairway. Cohen followed, but went into the rough. After smiting about wildly he managed to get clear. Hoo many? queried the Scots- man. Three, replied Cohen. Why, I counted ten masell roared Mac. Vas it my fault if I had to kill a grass snake? asked the resource- ful Cohen. BARNYARD CI-IATTER Poland China: What's that ban- tarri' rooster strutting about now for. Razorback: Didn't you see the boss's plane take off? Well, he thinks he chased it away. KNEW HIS GEOGRAPHY Yes, stamp collecting is educa- tional, said the fond mother to the visitor. For instance, where is Hungary, son? Without looking up from his stamp book the young philatelist answered promptly, Two pages in front of Italy. KNEW QUARTS BETTER Pedagog: Name the constituents of quarts. His Father's Son: Pints. HIS VERSION New Yorker: Where do you live? Boy: Minute Street. Never heard of it before. Well, other people call it Sixty- second Street. TOO MUCH COMPETITION Mrs. Newly-Rich was recounting to an acquaintance the thrilling events of the night before, when the house had been burgled. As a matter of fact, she said, we were eating our soup- Then of course, interrupted the candid friend, none of you heard anything. Miss Fedow: Kitty, this meat tastes queer. Student: That's funny. I admit I burnt it: but I applied unguentine immediately. TRANSLATION Name? queried the immigration official. Sneeze, the Chinese replied proudly. The official looked hard at him. Is that your Chinese name? he asked. No, English name, the oriental said blandly. Then let's have your native name. Ah Choo, said the Chinese. NO SLEUTHING NEEDED How did you find the weather while you were away ? Just went outside and there it was. Wouldn't it be funny if: Mr. Myers wore a beard? Miss Barlow forgot her earrings? Clarence Nicholson went with anyone by Evelyn Ramm? Mary Day palled with the same fellow for two weeks? Bobby Miller appeared at school with a bad disposi- tion? Mr. Winn would wear green cap and mittens next winter? Mr. McLean came to school without a car full of girls? Dick Juby went to band contests with anyone but Crary's? Dorothy I-Ieltzel flunked all four subjects? Irene Solyom wore long curls? No cars from Elgin High School were seen in front of Abbott School at noon hour? Bethryn Foltz forgot how to play the piano? Dorothy Sechrist didn't have five boys on the string? l33l Frances McCarthy wore small shoes? Clark McCornack didn't meet Dorothy Larson between periods? Wilcke Lou Hicks didn't try to show off? Dick Fink drove a car to school? Mildred Yates were seen at the store room not sur- rounded by students? Miss Taylor didn't make the annual a success? Evelyn Ramm were a blonde? Certain boys didn't like snakes? Miss Fedou's girls couldn't make delicious pies? We weren't proud of our band and orchestra? Mr. Miller were ungracious? Miss Geister taught -manual training? Marge Knuth weren't busy? Ralph Day were elected May Queen? No one wanted vacation to come? Anyone found out who wrote this?

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The BLUE and GOLD Sept. Sept. Sept Sept. Sept. Sept Oct. Oct. Oct. Oct. Nov. Nov. Nov. Nov. Nov. Nov. Nov. Nov. Nov. Dec. Dec. Dec. Dec. Dec. Jan. Jan. Jan. Jan. Jan. Jan. Jan. Jan. Feb. ANNUAL CALENDAR September -Mr. Miller gave a welcome Address. -Mr. Saam gave a very interesting speech concerning the values of education and scholarship both now and later. -First' pep meeting! The hand played several selections and several speeches were given. -The Abbottarian Staff gave a splendid pro- gram in auditorium. -We had a pep meeting in the auditorium. -Band gave a concert for auditorium program. October 4-Orchestra gave a concert for auditorium program. 11-Mr. Franklin Sorn and Dr. Lawrence J. Hughes sang some excellent duets. 18-Mr. Goble spoke on the topic, Choosing. 25-Band gave a concert. November 1-Abbott Boys' Quartette gave an excellent musical program. 1-No school this afternoon because of the N.R.A. parade in which the band marched. 3-No school!! Teachers went to Teachers Meet- ing at Joliet. 8-A banquet was very much enjoyed by the honor students and faculty of Abbott School. 8-Dr. Yi-fang Wu of Nanking University in China gave a very interesting talk. She is one of the party of the missionary, E. Stanley Jones. 15-Dr. Weng gave an interesting talk on the topic, Where do we go from here. 22-The Abbott Quintette played two enjoyable numbers, and Mr. Charles Page talked to us on the topic, Practice of Law. 28-Abbott Band gave its annual concert. 29-The clarinet quartette played two numbers. Rev. Brown spoke to us on the topic, Liv- ing the Right Kind of Lives. December 6-The orchestra gave a concert for auditorium program. 13-Mrs. Weng sang several bueautiful Christ- mas songs. Mr. Weng told us how other countries celebrated Christmas. 18-Attention!! Abbott School Play was presented. A matinee was enjoyed by the students and children of other schools. An evening performance pleased the older folks. 20-The Abbott chorus presented several delight- ful songs. 22-Christmas Vacation!!! January 3-Mr. Miller gave a short welcome address which was followed by several excellent piano solos played by Mr. Freeman Kadow. 12-Mr. Saam gave- an excellent talk. 17-Rev. Bennett gave a very interesting speech on the topic, Going Beneath the Surface. 22-Boys' Athletic department gave an amazing stunt program. 22-23-Nights for studying for exams!! 23-24-Final Exams!!! 26-No School!! Teachers' Meeting. 31-Mr. Miller told us what affect education has on the affairs of our country. February 7--Rev. Milmine told us not to take short cuts in the experiences of life but to get love and worthwhile knowledge out of every- thing we do. !40l Feb. Feb. Feb. Feb. Mar. Mar. Mar. Mar. Mar. Mar. April April April April April April May May May May May May May May June June 14-Mr. Young entertained us with several of his clever magic tricks. 21-Miss Alice Tobin sang several enjoyable 22- numbers. 23-Attention!!! Abbott Band presented its second annual minstrel show. Four splen- did performances were enjoyed by many adults and children. 28-Miss Jeanette Kling gave us some very good advice on, Charm and Personality. March 7-Girls' Glee Club and Abbott String Quin- tette gave several delightful musical se- lections. 14-The Girl Reserves presented a pantomime. 16-Abbott Band presented a concert at Plato Center. 17-The G.A.A. gave a party for all the mem- bers and their friends. 21-A puppet show was given by the Blue and Gold Stall' to advertise the Annual. 28-Letters!! Letters!! Blue and Gold letters 3 6 12 18 25 26 were awarded to the boys who had shown their ability in football, basketball, and tumbling. The brass quartette, cornet quartette, and ilute quintette gave several delightful numbers. April -The Abbott Band gave a splendid concert. -7-Attention!!! Abbott Band. several soloists, and three ensembles went to Joliet to the district contest. The band and three en- sembles received superior ratings. They are now eligible for the state contest at Urbana. The soloists rated good and excellent -Abbott Annual Stunt show was given. There were many splendid stunts presented by the various home rooms. -Girls' Tumbling team gave a remarkable tumbling program. Marilyn Jane Porter gave several clever tap dances. Election goxidMay Queen and her attendants was e . -The band presented a. delightful program. -27-28-Notice!! Abbott Band and Ensembles went to Urbana for the State Contest. The ensembles received good and ex- cellent ratings while the band received a good rating. May 2-Several enjoyable vocal solos were presented by Mr. Paul Born. 4-The orchestra present a splendid concert. 5-Attention!! Orchestra, soloists, and an en- semble went to the State Contest at Joliet. The soloists and ensemble received good and excellent ratings. The orchestra received excellent ratings. 11-Special band and orchestra members went to Aurora to play in the Fox Valley Festival. There were also several delegates from the Girls' Glee Club who did not participate but went to hear it. 16-Mr. Vonckx gave a very enjoyable talk. 17-Attention!! The Abbott Spring Fete was pre- sented with its usual colorful dancing and music and its lovely May Queen. 23-Mr. Helman gave a very interesting talk. 29-The students enjoyed a Memorial Day Pro- graln. June 2-The band played at the World's Fair. 8-End of school year. Cheerio!