University of Texas Austin - Cactus Yearbook (Austin, TX)

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%rVt .v ' Sww )b:iM WIRB PULUNG. Marvelous Discovery ! CACTINE! CACTINE!! CACTINE!!! A Perfectly Potent Panacea for all Student Ills. Especially recommended for all cerebro-cranial affections and diseases, such as swell head, sore head, that smart feeling, verdancy, officiousness, corridorania and its kindred affection, rotundania. Guaranteed to cure absolutely that re- cently discovered disease, lamit. Cactine is purely a product of the Cactus, made and especially prepared in the Cactus laboratories by an able and eflScient staff. Every case is given especial personal attention. Cactine proper is, the essence of the entire Cactus boiled down to a concen- trated extract. This we especially recommend to ailing Freshmen. Sold only in quart and half-gallon bottles. Cactine Tea is made from boiling the roots of the Cactus. It is a guaranteed remedy for verdancy, freshness, toughness, and the various and sundry obnoxious ills of all Freshmen and young and tender Junior Laws. For Testimonials of our Wonderful Remedies See Advertising Department. 266

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IN MEMORIAM. Dead Wind Do Boys Spurter, Killed by an Accidental Discharge of his Duty. Exact Date not Known. To Our Chief Executive. I is for me, And a whopper, you bet! I ' m sure you ' ll Sigree That the I that ' s for me Should a great big I be With a crown on it set, is for me, And a whopper, you bet. T is for you — A wearisome topic. Small things I eschew. So the y that ' s for you No attention is due It is so microscopic. Y is for you — A wearisome topic. ' Varsity Cook Book. i2mo., gilt edges, half -morocco bind- ing. Published by the Cactine Rem- edy Company. An invaluable addition to the library of any student. Sent prepaid on receipt of price. Full of valuable hints. We print below a couple of sample recipes : Chowder of Psycology Thesis. — Dilute one chapter of James with choice cullings from Lloyd Morgan,flavor care- fully with extract of Oppenheim, stir well to keep from being lumpy. Sprin- kle well with adjectives to remove copy- taste. For dressing, stir professor ' s notes tmtil of the proper consistency — potu over a thin layer of bibliography requiring little or no previous prepar- ation. Serve on time. How TO Cook Your Goose.— Catch a bird gamb(o)ling on the green, dip carefully into hot water, pluck his feathers, singe over a slow fire of in- discretions. For dressing, cut classes in sufficient quantities, mix with sass, soak in brandy. Roast him well over coals of criticism. When done up brown, serve with writs of ex- pulsion. « u F SO percH ths lauhs (% A Ts.

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